Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Is It OK to Creep on Dakota Fanning Now?

A photo of Dakota Fanning Dakota Fanning is 18, ok? She's 18 years old. She'll be 19 next month. She's an adult. That means I can think she's absolutely gorgeous, right? It just feels weird to me because we've all seen this girl grow up, you know? Like, when I think of Dakota Fanning, I think of the little girl from I Am Sam. I think of little baby Dakota Fanning. But when I see this magazine cover, I think "gorgeous." Is that ok? I feel like it's kind of creepy. But just look at this picture from the m...

Chris Brown Has A Cast on His Punchin’ Hand

A photo of Chris Brown Poor, poor Chris Brown. We all know that he didn't do anything wrong concerning his fight with Frank Ocean, and now look at this! This poor man has a cast on his right hand. What sort of monster is Frank Ocean anyway? What did he do to Chris' hand? He probably stomped on it, huh? Or maybe he had a hammer in his pocket, just for occasions like this. You never know when a kind, gentle soul like Chris is going to come along and need some bones broken. Oh, wait, is that the hand Chris punches with? He's right-handed, so I'm pretty sure it is. Is it possible that he got...

Lindsay Made A Miraculous Recovery, Will Be in Court This Morning

A photo of Lindsay Lohan From TMZ: Lindsay Lohan and her mom Dina took the last flight out of JFK last night and jetted to L.A. after being warned she'd be a wanted woman if she was a no-show in court this morning. Lindsay -- who is not just broke but deeply in debt -- waited in her car at the airport (above) until the last minute ... then flew first class on American Airlines and landed at around 12:30 AM. We're told Lindsay went into a panic after we posted our story Tuesday and started calling everyone to...

Lindsay Lohan Is Way Too Sick to Go to Court Tomorrow

A photo of Lindsay Lohan It's just that time of the year, guys. We're all going to get sick. Me, I've got the stupidest cold ever right now. My head feels funny and I don't want to do anything. Maybe you've had that awful flu. Maybe you caught malaria or diphtheria or syphilis or something, I don't know. But the point is that people are just generally ill this time of year. And that includes beautiful and glamorous celebrities like Lindsay Lohan! See, Lindsay has an upper respiratory infection. She has a doc...

Chris Brown Kind of Just Compared Himself to Jesus

A photo of Chris Brown Ok, ok. Chris Brown posted this photo on Instagram last night. The caption was "Painting the way I feel today. Focus on what matters!" And here's the photo: Whoa. Whoa. Hold up. Chris Brown painted a picture of Jesus on the cross because he was painting the way he feels. Are we all getting that? He seriously just did that. This is so much worse than when he compared himself to Tupac. I mean, I know you guys know who Jesus is, but can we really just take a moment to consider this? Chris Brown considers himself to be a Christian. That means th...

Hulk Hogan: Still The Creepiest

A photo of Hulk Hogan But why is Hulk Hogan the creepiest this time? It's because he tweeted this picture of his daughter: And he just captioned it "Brooke's legs." Gross. Now, this is creepy enough on it's own, I think - I mean, if my dad did this ... I don't know, I can't even imagine this, probably because my dad isn't gross - but what makes it really creepy is when you remember this picture: Yep, that's Hulk applying suntan lotion to his daughter's ass. He really got in there, too. There are photos that I don't care to post of him pretty much ru...

Quotables: Brandi Glanville Really Doesn’t Hold Back

A photo of Brandi Glanville "She can go f-ck herself! Well, she has to, because who would want to?" - Brandi Glanville asks a catty question that she forgets has a very simple answer. But ok, this is getting weird. Because we're in this space now where both Brandi and LeAnn keep talking about each other, and then they keep talking about how the other woman won't stop talking about her. It's starting to get a little confusing. I feel like the next time we see LeAnn do an interview, she's going to talk about Brandi because Brandi won't stop talking about her talking about her talking about her. This cycle can be endless, and it just needs to stop. By the way though, Brandi said that little thing about LeAnn at a recent bo...