Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Beyonce Supposedly “Had” a Baby, Named Her Tiana May Carter

photo of beyonce pictures pregnancy fake pregnant baby pic tiana may carter photo
So, right. Nothing’s been confirmed, but Twitter’s blowing up all over the place, which is, I’m sure, exactly what Beyonce wants, and of course, whatever makes Beyonce happy sets us free, right? Or is that Christina Aguilera? I don’t know. Who cares. All I know is that there’s this alleged newborn floating around New York City right now bearing the name Tiana May Carter, and she’s masquerading as the offspring of Beyonce and Jay-Z.

And remember how Beyonce’s fetus had its own Twitter account? Has that still been a thing up until now? Yeah. I just checked and it is. It was even tweeting yesterday, talking about getting its hair and makeup did, leaking bits and pieces of information like “It’s getting close” and “looking like a slip ‘n slide in here,” which is way, way more information than I really needed to know about the environment of Beyonce’s surrogate’s vaginal canal, you know? Then you have the classy tweets like “I kick so hard mothaf@**$rs wanna fine me.” That’s cute babyspeak right there, guys. Lastly, this Twitter account only reinforces the fact that Beyonce is full of shit, rather than full of a baby. Check out this tweet here:

“Wait a minute. Hold the phone. I might be popping out earlier than February 2012. You’ll know soon. Very soon.”

Know when it was issued? December 5th. So, what then, does Beyonce have a way premature baby on her hands, or were the best OB’s in the country OFF by eight or more weeks when estimating the kid’s due date? I mean, does that even happen?

Finally. If you believe that Beyonce actually carried this child and birthed this child and (gasp!) breastfed this child, then I have a really great bridge to sell you and, conveniently enough, it’s located not all that far from B and her baby in Brooklyn.

20 CommentsLeave a comment

  • It doesn’t make sense either way… a surrogate would have a due date that she’d have known well in advance of her retarded antics. So either the kid was ridiculously premature, or… what, this is just yet another publicity stunt?

    • Yeah, right? I had the same thought about the surrogacy thing. If obviously and clumsily faking a pregnancy is a publicity stunt, it seems like a stupid one. But I can’t think of any other reason for a migrating, deflating baby bump and being so far off on the due date.

  • This makes no sense. I thought she was only lik 4 months now she had her baby.?? Beyonce is full of crap. One min her bump is huge thn it’s small thn u can’t see it at all. Now she had it.???? This is all for attention.

  • Well, smart asses, if you ever learned anything in life you should know not everything you read is true,s o before you try to judge some one get your facts straight, she hasn’t even had her baby yet, So while y’all rant on about “it doesn’t even make sense; Beyonce is full of” get your shit together before you conclude. What Beyonce does in her life is her own personal life, let her to what she wants, its none of your business. GO find a hobby.

    • (1) You are dumb
      (2) stfu
      (3) You are hilarious to think what Bitchonyce does in her life is her own “personal life” and none of anyone’s business…bitch is a celebrity. WHY YOU ON A GOSSIP SITE IF YOU THINK IT’S PRIVATE BIDNESS, HO?
      (4) You just got pwnd by Sarah, how does that feel?

      • who are you to call somebody dumb
        like wtf shut up
        and technically it is beyonce’s personal life so how about you get a life, get a job and maybe get some kids of your own before you start talking about people and their kids
        oh and PWNED was like 2 fucking years ago
        so gtfo
        ughhhh dumbasses these days smh:)

  • Nooo way B is or was ever Prego! Anyone who has ever had a child can tell there is no way on earth you look like that! Your baby bump doesnt do disappearing acts…and no matter who you are your face/arms/legs/ankles. In the last few months swell…some more than others. My sister, who is a runaway model and has had three kids look Prego! Granted she was on the runaway a week later….but that girl is not Prego. Her ass would have exploded!

  • I had two babies, and I didn´t swell either. and, The baby bump, is indivitual..there is no 2 same. And she is in veeery good fit, that makes a different as well. And, she might be in bed rest if there has accured some problems on her preg. The baby might vome aerly, and the docs may hava say it so, so, don´t judge..

  • http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2081398/Beyonce-baby-Singer-saw-2012-Jay-Z-Brooklyn-restaurant.html

    Look at these pics… WHO say´s she is not preg.?
    and, coz the media LOVES this baby and mum + dad so much, it is a trick say she is further along tha she really is, or vice versa, she is almost due date and has said that isnt… the royalty does it, like Princess of Sweden, Victoria, has 100% DEFINETLY DONE IT, say that the due date is in march, when in fact, it will be feb, or even end of jan.

  • Beyonce is lying she should of lift up her shirt to address the rumors. Don’t even know when she having the baby I don’t think she can have kids

  • Hello!! How many judgy-Georginas can we possibly have on one page? Beyonce took a pic of her pregnant self in a swim suit just to put an end to these surrogacy rumors..knowing how private Beyonce can be(with good reason), does it come as such a surprise to you that she’d actually lie about her due date? I mean, she didn’t even tell people about this pregnancy till it was over 4months old. Personally, I see nothing wrong with what the unborn child supposedly said on twitter.. I think people just hate other people once those other people have achieved success. PS- @LegalEase- its only narrow-minded, irrelevant people like you that can say Finland is irrelevant just to make another person feel as lowly as you must feel about yourself. Let’s rejoice with those that rejoice people so that others can rejoice with us, cheers!