The Anonymous Entertainment Lawyer at Crazy Days and Nights, who has a nose for these things, writes,
Which Jersey Shore star is fond of saying, “It is not gay if someone else is doing the sucking,” whenever he is questioned about some of the people he has gone out with.
HA HA HA HA HA!
OK, I really have no idea who Enty is talking about here—but then again, there are only four dude castmembers on “Jersey Shore.” So! If I were to make four guesses, 25% of my guesses would be correct. Those are terrific odds. Alternatively, I could spend all four of my guesses on Mike “the Situation” Sorrentino, and then maybe I would be 400% right. Just sayin’.
Don’t get me wrong. I know sexuality is located on a larger, fluid continuum—Ha! Fluid! But seriously, I read “Savage Love,” you guys—and some perfectly heteronormative dudes are totally comfortable getting a beej from other dudes. That’s called being secure. But in the case of “Jersey Shore,” it could also be called “putting your penis, oh, just anywhere.”