Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Every Charlie Sheen Update, All At Once

Charlie Sheen's Violent Torpedo of Truth Tour

This is it. This is the Sheenpocalypse. We are now being engulfed in a deluge of Sheen.

– Yesterday, Comedy Central announced its “Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen.” It will star Charlie Sheen.

– The Roast is coincidentally scheduled to air the same day that Two and Half Men premieres with its new star, Ashton Kutcher. Huh.

– If anyone disses Brooke Mueller during this little Roast, she swears to God, she will sue his ever-living balls off, Charlie.

Faygo-a-go-go! Charlie Sheen is slated to co-host, for one night and one night only, the 12th Annual Gathering of the Juggalos. (Don’t worry, Insane Clown Posse fans! You can catch Dustin Diamond another night.)