Today's Evil Beet Gossip

OH GOD YES IT’S THE LA PREMIERE OF RUNAWAYS

I have been waiting for this moment FOREVAH. No one will actually end up seeing this movie (I predict it will be a phenomenal flop), but this red carpet moment is to DIE for.

Kirsten Stewart. Joan Jett. Dakota Fanning. Cherie Currie.

It’s like Kristen and Dakota are these young women who should be incredibly confident with their sexuality on a red carpet and yet are both incredibly awkward with it, and Joan and Cherie are these two older women who should be downplaying their sexuality on a red carpet and yet both are like “LOOK AT MY HALF-NUDE BODY, DON’T YOU WANT TO THROW ME DOWN ON THE FLOOR AND DO COCAINE OFF ME, TAYLOR LAUTNER??”

Also there: Taylor Lautner (duh, Cherie Currie brought him in her left tit because he’s not old enough to drive yet), Ryan O’Neal, Tatum O’Neal, and, in the coup de grace, Judge Reinhold, for reasons that will remain a mystery (read: he’s Kristen Stewart’s date).

Lastly: If that Dakota Fanning puts on any more weight I’m gonna have to start calling her Dakota Fatting.*

*Kidding, of course. She couldn’t be any thinner. But sometimes I like to rile you guys up. Okay, always.

34 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I LOVE Kristen Stewart’s dress here, it suits her body SO well (she/her stylist get it right every once in a while), the colour is brilliant, and it just works for the subject of the movie, too.

    Dakota on the other hand… her dress and hair are too boring for the premiere of a movie where she plays a punk rock chick… too bad she didn’t wear something edgier, or at least do something with her hair or makeup.

    I hope you’re wrong, Beet, about this movie’s box office success, but I’m not holding my breath…

  • ‘Cherie Currie brought him in her left tit because he’s not old enough to drive yet’
    hahaha
    Yay! Welcome back Beet!!

  • oh my god look at her boobs. jesus christ. isn’t it the younger ones who are supposed to be flaunting it like that?
    and what an ugly ass dress. (kristen’s)

      • dude, in this day and age and country, i really don’t think we need to be concerned about 16 year olds showing their bodies, not with 9 year olds like noah cyrus out there, who wear more suggestive halloween costumes than i’ve ever worn in my 22 year life. (not that i support the overt sexualization of women and (young!) girls. i actually just wrote my thesis on it – los angeles, the west, and the world: how hollywood is destroying female health and body image worldwide) anyway, i didn’t so much suggest that dakota should be “flaunting it” as that cherie, at 50, should not be.

        and the dress thing? just my opinion. obviously i’m in the minority on that, but geez, calm down.

  • I loooooove Kristen’s dress! She’s finally wearing something that looks halfway decent on her and that’s much more her age! Woo hoo!

    AND DEAR GOD SHE’S SMILING!

  • Sooo love that Kristen looks like she is actually making an effort here, that pic of her with Joan in which she is actually smiling got to love it, maybe she only looks like she’d rather not be there when she is having promote trash like Twilight.

    • I’m pretty sure that’s it. I saw an interview with her promoting Twilight but she kept talking about a future project that she was sooo excited for but couldn’t talk about yet.
      This was probably it. She’s probably proud that she actually had to work hard and put out a movie that critics aren’t slamming everywhere.

  • OMG!!! i was so ready to go ape shit crazy onyou guys for ‘Dakota fatting’ till i read the bottom. very funny

  • i really dont care apo the rest of the post(i will have my opinion about the movie after i watch it) but the fatting joke was lame!!!!

  • There has not been a new post on this blog since sometime early yesterday. Where are all you lazy people? Drag ypur lazy asses out of the sack and get to work. Jeez.

  • I saw this move… and its pretty darn good. Kristen Stewart is better in the film than Dakota fanning (she’s not bad, I just think she was miss cast)

    So much fun to watch, even though in my opinion, they don’t go far enough with the story. Maybe the director wanted to please everyone involved. I would see it again. I hope its a huge success, it is beautifully made.

  • I kinda want to see this film. I think K Stew is a bit underrated. (Can we call her K Stew now? Pleeeeeeeeeeeze?)