Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Angelina Jolie Says She Gave Up on Breast-Feeding the Twins

OMG, I’m excited for a lot of things about motherhood, but breastfeeding is definitely not one of them. I know it’s important and helps the kid get good nutrients and bond with the mother and stuff, but the thought of an unpredictable mini-person sucking on my nipples kind of makes me feel funny. Hey, do vegans breast-feed? Is Alicia Silverstone going to breast-feed her kids?

Okay, I just did some research, and it appears vegan moms have to breastfeed, because none of the grocery-store baby formulas are truly vegan. So, in some weird way, having your baby drink your breast milk is the only way to truly raise a vegan baby. Okay. So. Then, if I made cheese out of human breast milk, would it be vegan? Someone get Alicia on the phone. I may be onto an enormous untapped market. I mean, I know people have made breast milk cheese (example here, but it’s in French), but have they ever marketed it as vegan? See, mom? That MBA wasn’t for nothing after all.

What the fuck was I even writing this about?

Oh, yeah. Angelina Jolie said breast-feeding the twins sucked, and I believe her.

“It’s very hard,” the actress confessed on Britain’s morning show GMTV. “I stopped at three months, [it was] about as much as I could do.”

The actress, 33, who was in London promoting her film The Changeling with her partner Brad Pitt in tow and their four-month-old twins, Knox Léon and Vivienne Marcheline, said she even resorted to manuals on the subject.

“There’s this football hold – it’s a lot harder than it looks in the books,” she says in the prerecorded interview at her London hotel on Monday. “I did that a few times. I would take turns. It just takes a long time.”

The mom of six also revealed that it was while filming The Changeling that she became pregnant with the twins: “We decided to start trying in the beginning, and by the end I was.”

Look, if Angelina can’t do it, it is officially impossible. Because we all know that she is better at everything than anyone else.

You know what else is kind of sad? A few years ago, I would have been all like, “Oooh, I want to try to make babies for months and months with Brad Pitt.” But Brad’s lost a lot of his allure since he got with Angelina. He’s become less of Mr. Bradley Pitt and more of Mr. Angelina Jolie. I dunno. I think of him less as a sex symbol now. Not that that’s a bad thing. It’s just something that occurred to me.

29 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I just had twins two months ago (a boy and a girl also) and breastfeeding them is fine. I also have a toddler to chase around, like she does.

  • As a mom of a 6 month old, I understand where she’s coming from. I stopped breastfeeding after 2 weeks. Number one because this mysterious little person started TEETHING on them even though no teeth were coming in, and two, because it was just plain awkward. I even had a c-section because I told the doctor the thought of pushing something THAT big out of my vagina was too disgusting to fathom, he thought about it then decided that because my baby had not tilted completely and was stuck diagnally, the c-route was the best way to go.

    On the subject of Brad’s sex appeal. I completely agree. Meanwhile, with Johhny Depp, his sex appeal is still huge because let’s face it, not many americans know who Vanessa Paradis is (I’ve been a fan of hers for a few years now) and if you’ve seen pics of her out-and-about with the children… she’s starting to look completely worn out. She’s gotten to the point of thiness (That Johnny seems to be so found of) where it looks like she’s actually got an Adam’s apple.

  • Also on the subject of Brad, I used to read about what a huge pot enthusiast he was. Where’d all his bongs go? o.0

    Beet, research this matter, stat!

  • breast feeding is different for everyone. and amanda, not only does she have a toddler, she only has an additional three other young children.. not to mention a huge career/ charitable work to keep her busy.

    she did it for 3 months. give the chick a break.

  • breast milk cheese would not be vegan, since humans are animals and that would make it an animal product. which would make it not vegan.

  • Don’t you have to eat really well when you’re nursing? Maybe that was the problem – bitch doesn’t eat!

  • i thought the whole idea behind a vegan diet was sort of “not taking from the unwilling” so to speak, because animals dont have consciencious thoughts like humans.. therefor allowing humans to do whatever with their own breast milk that they please.

  • You should really get over the ick factor Ms Beet. It’s 10 times easier than bottles and formula, lugging that crap around, cleaning bottles, and all that.

  • oh please, it takes a long time…so what! you are bonding with & nurturing your babies, i know its challenging, but if you can do it & have access to all the help she has access to, then not doing for at least 6 months is kind of inexcuseable….if anyone could make the time it would be her…thats what nannies are for…since breast feeding helps you lose weight, i am surprised this vain bitch didnt decide to do it for years!

  • I’d eat your breast milk cheese. Really. Why does that gross (most) people out but not cow’s milk cheese? Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE cow’s milk cheese (I tried to be vegan but missed cheese to much!) I just don’t get why human breast milk is so taboo?
    Also, there is soy formula that IS vegan. My son is allergic to cow & goats milk products so we gave/give him soy.
    That was after I nursed him, for a year. And I enjoyed nursing him. I’m not crazy about if women do or don’t, I just say try it, you might like it.

  • Now if only she would give up snatching other people’s spouses or spouses-to-be…can I get a “Hell Yeah”, JenAn and Laura Dern??

    @Delaney…

    I’m sorry but there’s something a little ridiculously selfish about not wanting to give birth to your baby naturally because it grosses you out and stopping breastfeeding because it’s “awkward” for you. Ever hear of bonding and nurturing?? “Ew, how disgusting, pushing something out of my vagina, yucky!!” Give me a break you twit.

  • When you get pregnant, you should understand that after nine months and then some, a 6-9 lb creature is going to come out of your vagina and want to suck on your nipples.

    Our bodies are designed for it.

    That’s not to say that c-sections are required on some occasions, but I’ll never understand why someone would CHOOSE to undergo major abdominal surgery rather than push a baby through the birth canal.

  • Beet: When you get pregnant and learn about all the health benefits of breastfeeding I hope you’ll want to give it a try. A couple of my friends stopped because it was too painful but the rest had no problems and continued until their kids were two or so. It just depends.

    As far as Brad goes, I agree that he’s lost some of his charm by having an affair while he was still married to Jen. Having a bunch of kids can’t cover that up. If I were mean I’d say it’ll be funny when Ange leaves him for a younger man and sticks him with the kids. But I wouldn’t wish that on the kids.

  • I breastfed my twins for 18 months… she COULD do it, she CHOSE not to. I have five kids and a husband without the luxury of personal chefs, personal assistances and nannies.

    Beet, I’m sure men have done worse to your nipples than a baby could ever.

  • yeah…i agreed beet…brad is less “Legends of the Falls” and more “Babel” now…less fucky indeed.

    i guess that is the way of dads.

    then again…

    angelina IS a fucking goddess though, when you take that into account…she has managed to make the Pittster less alluring, and she has never been so gorgeous, in my opinion.

    way 2 turn the tables, girlfriend. that’s right u men…SUCK IT!
    we rule :-)

  • I did it for 8 months, and it was all consuming because my boys were HUNGRY. I did start supplementing them with formula around 7 months because I did not make as much as they wanted, even thought La Leche said I would. I guess some people don’t. I also just fed both at the same time, so I would have to strip naked from the waist up and use all these pillows to prop everyone up. It is hard, but it is doable and much quicker than messing with bottles. It takes planning and discipline, though, and it doesn’t sound like Angelina requires a lot of disciplined activity around her household.

    ALso, when nursing twins food doesn’t matter as much as WATER. You have to drink a ton. It really helps.

  • Vegan DO breastfeed. Being vegan means not exploiting animals for their milk, skin, meat etc. as they don’t give their consent. Breastfeeding is natural – every baby animal feeds from its mom when he/she is born, human or non-human animals alike. On the other side, stealing baby milk to feed it to your kid is totally unnatural (unless you think you baby needs to be 350 pounds in a year like calves). xoxo

  • beet a lot of people lose a ton of their baby weight through breastfeeding because it makes your metabolism work at super speed! that’s a good reason to breast feed. :)

  • I actually like him better now that he’s with her. He doesn’t worry about being Mr. Perfect all the time and acts like a real guy.

  • “I breastfed my twins for 18 months… she COULD do it, she CHOSE not to. I have five kids and a husband without the luxury of personal chefs, personal assistances and nannies.”

    EXACTLY!!!

    and JK I agree with you 100%

  • LOL.. I couldn’t breastfeed my kids either.. It hurts like a mofo and my nipples were bleeding and so on and so on.. Even if i had another baby, i wouldn’t even bother to be quite honest.. Thank God for formula and c sections, because i wouldn’t, for a million dollars, have a baby the natural way.. That’s my opinion and i’m sticking to it.. And i understand a lotta people see it differently, and that’s ok, i respect that.. But i just dont think that way..

    And yeah, all of Brad’s sexiness and cuteness went away when he cheated on Jennifer…. I don’t find him attractive at all since..

  • There’s nothing un-vegan about breastfeeding. It’s natural for a mother to feed her babies the milk she was provided with. Vegans want cows to feed baby cows (etc), and not have to overproduce milk to give it to humans!

  • Everyone’s bodies and babies are different. So this idea that if you didn’t stick with breast feeding, your selfish, lazy or whatever. I was very excited about breastfeeding my daughter and did for 6 weeks. But she would fall asleep each and everytime and therefore was not gaining weight. Yes, I tried all sorts of things to keep her awake, none of them worked. Ever have a baby attached to your tit for 6 hours at a time? Not fun. So we switched to formula, she gained weight and the rest is history.