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Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson’s Relationship Woes Are All Stephenie Meyer’s Fault

robert pattinson kristen stewart stephanie meyer pics

No one gives two shits about Stephenie Meyer anymore now that the whole Twilight saga is finally done. Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson have probably deleted her number from their iPhones and added her email address to their spam filter, but like door to door Jesus peddlers, Stephenie won’t go away that easy. To stay in the press, she’s opened up and admitted that she blames herself for KStew and RPattz’s relationship woes because if they weren’t involved in the Twilight brouhaha, the whole Rupert Sanders cheating scandal probably wouldn’t have happened.

From The Times:

“Here’s the thing: there are some actors who are looking to be world famous, to be that household name, and although they might discover that there are a lot of negative things involved in that, it’s what they want.

“But that doesn’t apply to Kristen and Rob. That’s what makes it kind of ironic and tragic. I just don’t think they enjoy the parts [of fame] that other people would. And I totally get that, because it would not be my thing either.

“At the same time – and this is where the guilt comes from – it’s created this nice, peaceful place for me. They took all of my heat, which I feel bad about. If they had the choice, I’ve no idea if they’d even do Twilight again.

“I just don’t know. I think this has all come at a heavy price.”

What are you even talking about, Stephenie Meyer? This couldn’t have less to do with you if it was about, I don’t know, Daniel Radcliffe being a secret boozehound. The only heat they’ve taken is probably being told upteen times what shitty writing is involved in the storylines. And yeah, Rob and Kristen don’t “like” fame (though they love the money that comes with it, obvs) and there might have been some total desperate wannabes out there that would have hammed it up in front of the camera 24/7, but being famous and not really feeling the media doesn’t make couples cheat on one another. Are you an idiot? Sorry… silly question. Forgot I was talking to the author of Twilight.

14 CommentsLeave a comment

  • K Stew’s a lil’ dyke. Why else would Jodie Foster & Joan Jett take her under their overprotective wings? Think aboot it…

    • Maybe they saw her standin there by the record machine, she didn’t love rock n roll & didn’t have another dime for the jukebox, baby.

  • Ok, I’ve never seen anything she’s acted in, does she always have that slimy smirk on her face? It’s like a ” yeah bitch, I queefed…. Whats it to ya?” look on her face.

  • LOOOOL queefs are always funny! And once again…not far off at all. Shite actress, shite attitude.

      • Thats what we need…. A thread on the intricacies of vaginal queefing! Sorry about your dinner!

      • Kidding – it’s a good time and distracting while I’m annoyed by the travelers around me. So did you mean to say at you, or on you? Like did you smell it and/or feel the vibration? And did she look rode hard & put away wet, or was she a delight to look at so that it wasn’t thaaaaat heinous? Cute healthy chicks can get away with it, without grossing you fellas out, right?? So many questions…

  • At me and on the tip of my cigar, the end of my stogey glowed red for a second or two. I guess she wanted to show off her control. Ive seen strippers blow out matches, and one in the Philipines was shooting out ping pong balls. I pulled the 20 dollar bill she was hoping for & gave her nothing…. Hell, it was a $30.00 cigar!

  • Nice to know a dude’s perspective. On your cigar is blasphemy, UGH NO, shmoking the nastiest of germs??–iiiiiii don’t think so. I’ve heard of the whole blowing-out-a-candle trick. Ping pong balls – what talent, what control! Yep, the vajayj is almighty, all powerful, so K-Stew, I ain’t mad atcha, little lez. Get it, grrrl. See? Our sick minds made it full circle. And to think guest is convinced we’re one person talking to one’s self…

    • Lmao, we have indeed come full circle! I bet guests queefs sound like a trucker with a cluster of rhoids the size of a bunch of grapes & just finished 6 bowls of chili and a six pack of beer. While yours, I’m sure, sound like angel whispers!