Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Here’s A Picture Of Justin Timberlake Dressed As A Lime

justin timberlake

I just don’t know about this one, guys. I wish I did, but I don’t. Apparently Justin Timberlake has a tequila company called Sauza 901 and for a new video advertising the brand, he decided to dress like a lime. I don’t know if this is genius or terrifying or a combination of both.

I don’t want to ruin too much of this with commentary, because I truly believe it speaks for itself. What it’s saying, I’m… not really sure. But please take 3 minutes and 19 seconds out of your day to enjoy/be perplexed by this. You haven’t lived until you’ve watched Justin Timberlake as a human lime.

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Ireland Baldwin Is Out Of Rehab & No Longer A Blonde

ireland baldwin

The last we heard from Ireland Baldwin, she was having an on-again, off-again relationship with Angel Haze. They later broke up and I guess Ireland was really going through some shit, because the next thing we knew, she went off to rehab to deal with everything. She’s now officially out, though she plans to continue participating in the center’s programs as she works on her recovery.

The 19-year-old model checked out of SOBA Recovery Center in Malibu, California, after three weeks of treatment for emotional trauma but will still participate in the facility’s programs, a source tells PEOPLE

She seems to be back in the swing of things, if her Twitter and Instagram accounts are anything to go by (and are they ever, really?). Hopefully she’s feeling better. Also, Hopefully she and Angel rekindle things because I actually think they were a pretty cute couple. Then again, if Ireland is working on herself right now, it’s probably for the best that she’s not with anyone at all, for the time being.

What do you think of her new, darker hair? I almost didn’t recognize her!

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Kylie & Kendall Jenner Want To Trademark Their Names

kylie jenner kendall jenner

Have you ever seen a family less aware of the world around them than the Kardashian/Jenner clan? Every single member – save for maybe Bruce, but he stayed with Kris for, like, 25 years, so I question his judgment, as well – lives in the clouds and has no idea how life actually works for most people. That’s the only reason I can imagine that Kylie and Kendall Jenner thought it would be a great idea to try and trademark their names.

From TMZ:

It’s all part of the Kardashian’s blitzkrieg campaign. We’ve learned Kylie Jenner has filed an application last month to trademark her first name to “entertainment in the nature of providing information by means of a global computer network in the fields of entertainment, fashion and pop culture.”

Kylie also wants to mark her territory for personal appearances “by a celebrity, actress and model.”

Although someone might theoretically use the name “Kylie” with a different font, K.J.’s lawyers could swoop in and argue it creates confusion among consumers. So Kylie Minogue, move over.

BTW … Kendall has filed an application to trademark her first name for the same purposes.

Guys, I wish I was joking. When I first read this, I thought I had accidentally clicked on The Onion because it’s too ridiculous even for them. At least Kendall has a “job” as a model for now, while she’s the flavour of the month. Kylie does absolutely fuck all besides try to look like Kim and date a grown ass man who’s been with her since before she was legal.

Plus, clearly no one has introduced Kylie to the ORIGINAL and forever queen of the name:

I rest my case.

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The Met Gala Brought Out Some Strange Fashion – PHOTOS

sarah jessica parker

Last night was the annual event we all look forward to more than any other for its sheer ridiculousness: The Met Gala. This year’s theme for the Costume Institute Benefit Gala was ‘China: Through The Looking Glass’, and the results were… mixed. Some people totally got into the obscene gaudiness of it all, as you can tell with our good old friend Sarah Jessica Parker above. She truly embraced the spirit of the Met Gala, so we have to applaud her for that… even if her ensemble is God awful. Worse than Rihanna‘s? That’s debatable.

rihanna met gala 2015

The fashion was worth examining more closely, either way.  It should go without saying that behind the cut, things get SUPER image heavy, so if you’re on a slow connection (does that even exist anymore?), proceed with caution.

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Sofia Vergara Speaks Out On Nick Loeb’s Embryo Emo Fit

sofia vergara

Oh, Nick Loeb. So sad, so very, very sad… in every sense, both emotionally and pathetically. After he gave Sofia Vergara an ultimatum to have kids now or split, she walked out on him and he didn’t take it so well – especially since she quickly moved on to serious upgrade, Joe Manganiello. Now he’s boo hoo-ing to anyone who will listen about how badly he wants to keep embryos they’d frozen together WHEN THEY WERE TOGETHER even though he signed a contract admitting that, you know, he can’t do that without her agreement. He’s an asshole, and finally Sofia has spoken about this whole mess publicly for the first time since it all kicked off.

Sofia was on Howard Stern’s Sirius XM show on Monday and he asked her how she’s feeling as she’s going through all this BS. Her response was priceless:

“I’m not going through anything. He’s going through it.”

“A child needs a mother and a loving relationship with parents who don’t hate each other. I don’t hate him but obviously he has a problem. A kid needs parents. I wouldn’t want to bring kids to the world where it’s already set against them. It would be so selfish.”

“You sign papers. If it was so serious for him, this issue, which I totally respect because it’s serious. Then you should’ve taken it more seriously at the time. There is a contract. He can’t do anything…. We did it two times. You make the mistake the first time. Two times? And now you want to change your mind?! …You have to follow what you sign!”

“I’m okay. I didn’t do anything wrong. This is a year later.”

Get ‘em, girl! This whole “case” is pretty much non-existent and the most obvious thing ever. Loeb has no case and he needs to see a therapist because he obviously has some serious issues to work through.

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Tiger Woods & Lindsey Vonn Are OVER

tiger woods lindsey vonn

I’m going to be honest – I kinda forgot that Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn even existed, let alone the fact that they’re dating. Or WERE dating, that is, because their three year relationship has come to a close. Lindsey announced the news via her Facebook page, because I guess she realized that no one has cared about them for a long ass time.

After nearly three years together, Tiger and I have mutually decided to end our relationship. I will always cherish the…

Posted by Lindsey Vonn on Sunday, 3 May 2015

Well, that’s all very special. We can go back to forgetting about them now, right?

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Royal Baby #2 Officially Has A Name

kate middleton charlotte

Kate Middleton and Prince William welcomed their second child, until now known as “Royal Baby #2″ on Saturday, and it wasn’t until today that they decided to share the name with the public. So what is our new Princess to be called? Charlotte Elizabeth Diana.

Charlotte was one of the bookies’ favourites over the past several weeks, so they’ll be paying out bigtime now that it’s actually confirmed. Charlotte is also the feminine form of Charles, her grandfather’s name, though who knows if they were actually thinking of that (they likely were). Elizabeth is obvious, as well, given the circumstances, as is Diana.

I love that they actually put Diana in there – lovely tribute to William’s mother. It’s a shame she never got to see her grandkids or even to meet Kate – I think they would have gotten along well, for some reason.

Anyway, congrats (again) to the happy family!

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