Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Tila Tequila’s pregnancy saved her life

tila tequila

The world’s most awful Nazi sympathizer, Tila Tequila, announced her pregnancy online last week, and while she’s a hot fucking mess who has no business raising a child, she still insists this whole thing is a blessing and is the life-saving experience she needed.

“It has been quite a painful journey for me, and I never thought I was going to make it out alive. So to be able to do a total 180 and finally be blessed with my first child gets me so emotional that I can barely even handle it,” she continues. “The only difference is that now these tears I cry are of joy, and no longer of sadness.”

The first-time mom-to-be adds that she feels “finally healed” after “so many traumatic years” in the spotlight. “I truly feel that my baby has saved my life, and I will do whatever it takes to give my little baby the whole entire world!” she vows. “I know I’m going to cry so much when the baby is finally born later this year.”

“I never knew such a love like this could exist, but I guess motherhood can truly change some people,” she tells Us of her future son or daughter. “I know it has definitely changed me, and I’m already thinking about having more. I just want my baby to be proud of me and to know how much I love him or her. To love someone else unconditionally is one of the best feelings in the entire world, and I hope I will have plenty more pregnancies to come.”

Let’s be honest – the only thing she’s “changed” by so far is probably weird cravings for ice cream and pickles or whatever. Sorry, but I’m not buying this bullshit. She just found out she’s pregnant and suddenly she’s an entirely different person? If I didn’t already know what a fucking nutterball she is, I’d feel like I was the one taking crazy pills here. I’d almost rather Lindsay Lohan have a baby over her!

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1 CommentLeave a comment

  • The idea that a pregnancy saved her sanity is probably a solid indication that she never had any sanity to begin with.