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9Scarlett Johansson Is Apparently the Sexiest Woman Alive

scarlett johansson esquire

For the second time, Scarlett Johansson has won Esquire‘s illustrious “Sexiest Woman Alive” title, making me ask the question: Is this for real? The fact that shit like this even exists is corny as hell (and has anyone noticed how many more “sexiest woman” contests there are than one for men?) but whatever, that’s how the world works at this point, I suppose. And hey, as women, we do exist to be great to look at for male eyes, so I suppose it’s a high honour, right? (Insert eyeroll here.)

But fine, I’ll play along. This is the second time she’s won the title – the first being in 2006 – and I sorta wonder, like, is this the best we can do? Scarlett Johansson is beautiful (and engaged!) and all that, but can anyone tell me if anyone at Esquire can think beyond the “looks great in lingerie” concept to consider other things that might make a woman really sexy, like… I dunno, intelligence? Activism? Fearlessness and ambition? A great sense of humour? I mean, I know the publication doesn’t necessarily pander to thinking audiences, but come on.

Also, is it just me or is that cover anything but sexy? She looks like she’s trying to keep from pissing herself. Anyway, do you, ScarJo. I don’t hate the player, I hate the game that makes you feel like all you are is a set of tits and a pair of legs.

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October 8, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Scarlett Johansson

9 Responses to “Scarlett Johansson Is Apparently the Sexiest Woman Alive”

  1. Jage says:

    Wonder who’s genius idea it was to pose the “sexiest woman alive” on the cover like she’s lifting a cheek to let a hot fart out. Super awkward, not so sexy.

  2. mireee says:

    So tired of these cattle contests, so tired of having a woman’s worth displayed in a scale from 1 to 10, ugh ugh ugh.

  3. Anon says:

    What a dumb facial expression, too. If this was the best picture out of the film she took then she is a terrible model..

  4. DudeAbides says:

    i read the article and the comments, and the only thing i can say is that green is not a good look in any of you girls, envy is really unbecoming. Also, sorry, but the hard truth is that activism, fearlessness and all that crap is not sexy, boobs, asses legs and faces are.

  5. Stacey says:

    What happens to the other women who’ve ‘won’ this title in the past? Are they killed off?

  6. Anonymous says:

    Again really “Sexiest Woman Alive” why the hell do these people (magazines and whatever) always say things like .. Sexiest or Beautiful In the World or Alive (men or women) do they really think celebs are the most beautiful sexy ppl Do they really not think there are incredibly sexy beautiful ppl that aren’t famous. A-holes

  7. Malia says:

    This made me so happy. Thank you for writing this.

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