Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Oh God The Cringe Part 2: Charlie Sheen Publicly And Angrily Rejects Farrah Abraham

charlie sheen david letterman

Charlie Sheen and Farrah Abraham were sending some flirty, cinge worthy texts about meeting up (but NOT for coffee). I was hoping that the texts were real, and it turns out that they are, because Mr. Sheen found out that Ms. Abraham leaked the texts to TMZ, and he is not okay with it. With the help of an 8th grader, he wrote a very scathing letter. From TMZ:

hey, you desperate guzzler of stagnant douche agua;

I truly do not recall giving you permission to globally reveal any communication between us. congrats on surviving your lobotomy and an even bigger congratz on the recent attempt at porn.

your daughter must be so proud.

please send my number to middle earth and if allowed, eagerly follow it into said abyss and slam the door behind you. the world will collectively sigh as the pungent memory of you vanishes into the pedestrian troposphere of lame-suck and zero-life.

oh and I’m sure they’ll wave the cover charge when they see your tranny-boobs and five o’clock shadow.

bye!
cs.

After reading this, I think he’s just as bad as Farrah Abraham. It’s really disappointing this didn’t work out, because they really deserve each other. Let’s use this as a learning experience:

1. Do not share text messages with TMZ.
2. Do not make Charlie Sheen angry.
3. Do not be Farrah Abraham or Charlie Sheen.

10 CommentsLeave a comment

  • So is that the new fun, hip, insult-y thing to do? Basically pick apart someone’s body and call it ugly because they’re causing you a bad day? Eeeesh. No wonder there’s so much self-hate for our bodies. We all perpetuate it.

  • Charlie is, and will always be a major ass-hat. That being said, his response to that anal bleach needing, rectal polyp known as Farrah Abraham, was hilarious!

  • Oh em jee FANTASTIC.
    Tell it, Chazmeister!
    Side note to movie buffs: I totally enjoyed Cracky McTiger Blood’s latest flick, A Glimpse Inside the Mind of Charles Swan III. Didn’t want to when I saw his mug on the cover, but shit, it was pretty well done. Dare I say…I loved it.
    As for the skank, yes, shut. that. shit. DOWN.

  • Charlie is pretty accepting usually. Farrah is the biggest a-hole I’ve seen in media in a long time. I hate her too. Bravo, Charlie. Well said.

  • That was a truly an epic burn. I’ll give Charlie props for one thing, he can insult someone better than just about anyone I’ve ever seen. And that bitch deserves all of it and then some.

  • You know what, he had every right to insult her like that. who is she to publish their text messages?? i’d be pissed too!