Today's Evil Beet Gossip

So Apparently Gwyneth Paltrow And Taylor Swift Are BFF Now

gwyneth paltrow taylor swift friends

Gwyneth Paltrow and Taylor Swift are apparently BFF now and let me tell you something, if this was all one big high school cafeteria, I would avoid the everloving f-ck out of their table. Gwyneth, over a plate of aubergines, would be complaining about how embarrassing it is to beautiful, as Taylor would eagerly nod her head and then ask if she should send another “Do you like me? Check ‘yes’ ‘no’ ‘maybe'” note to the cute guy in geometry.

According to Fishwrapper,

During a recent performance stopover in London, Taylor managed to squeeze in some good, old-fashioned girl time, and with it, probably triggered a whole plethora of rumors about the status of Gwyneth and Chris Martin’s marriage.

They also add (jokingly?) that Gwyneth and Taylor have been “friends” for “years”. “Years”? Gwyneth is 20+ years older than Taylor. About 3 years ago, Swift couldn’t even legally share a glass of organic thousand dollar wine with Paltrow. Unless an underage Swift was with her in England, of course, Gwyneth’s fake motherland.

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  • The way Paltrow is looking at Taylor it makes me think there is about to be a “Taylor Swift breakup song” written about her. She looks like a preditory old “cougar”.

  • Gwyneth looks like she’s about to take a bath in Taylors blood and then devour her remains so that she can absorb Taylors youth.

  • until I saw the check for $8748, I didn’t believe …that…my brothers friend woz like truley making money part time from their laptop.. there best friend has done this for less than nineteen months and resantly took care of the depts on there condo and got a great Peugeot 205 GTi. this is where I went, Bow6.com

  • Hello,may I introduce myself to Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,my name is Ike Nash,and originally I grew up in the Caribbean in an island named,St.Vincent & The Grenadines,but now I reside in the city named,Toronto,in the country named,Canada,plus I’m a very adorable plus sexy looking guy,and I’ll like to say that if Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow shall ever happen to be in the city named,Toronto in the country named,Canada at the ending of this month,which is the month of June 2013,I feel that Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow should pass into as well as visit a very fantastic Restaurant/Cafe,which is called,The Only Cafe,and the very fantastic Restaurant which is called,The Only Cafe,is located in a very fantastic village which is called,Donlands On Danforth Ave East,which is also located in the city named,Toronto,in the country named,Canada,and I’ll like to say that if Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow might ever happen to pass into as well as come into and visit,the very fantastic restaurant named,The Only Cafe,I’ll like to say that,I’ll cheerfully purchase for Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow some very amazing supper as well as some very awesome fruit drinks,there,at,The Only Cafe,and I’ll like to say that,the time as well as the date,that Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,should arrive at,the very fantastic Restaurant/Cafe,named,The Only Cafe is on the,30th of June 2013,at 8:00 PM,in the evening,and I’ll happily purchase for Her,some supper there,at,The Only Cafe,and for now,here is a very romantic rap song that I’ve written dedicating it to Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,and the name of it is called,Love Ya Babe,and I’ve written my song for Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,to the instrumental of a rap song named,Murderah,using all of my own words/lyrics,and dear Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,the rap song named,Murderah was originally sang by a singer named,Bizzy Bone,so dear,Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Palrow,here is my very very romantic love song for you,Babe,plus I hope that you’ll enjoy it,take very happy care,plus enjoy your evening Miss/Ms,see ya,bye Miss/Ms.

    The name of my very romantic song for Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow is called: Love Ya Babe.

    This is my verse 1 for Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow:

    Love Ya,Babe,I’ll place,none,Above,you,I’ll Care,for you,Be There,and Near,For You,I’ll call you,Dear and Fair,provide,for,you,I’ll be so caring,Sincere,I’m Your’s,Truly,You should,Marry Me,Pretty Babe,I’m Fine,very cheerful,with lots of Nice Ways,Monday staright down to,Friday,I’ll,Dine,with you,in my City,Paying for,Everythang,Let’s Hang,plus have,a Blast,a very,really,nice,merry,time,drinking from the Glasses,that’s full,of very,Fine Grape Wine,we’ll pass the,Time,laughing,Cutie,and watch,the stars,Shine.

  • This is a very charismatic rap song for Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow and the name of it is called,Beauty Queen,and I’ve written my very romantic rap song to the instrumental of a song named,2 Of America’s Most Wanted,using all of my own words/lyrics,and dear Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow the song named,2 Of America’s Most Wanted,was originally sang by two singers named,Tupac Shakur featuring another singer named,Snoop Doogy Dogg,so dear Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow,here is my very romantic love song for you,enjoy the rest of your day Miss/Ms,bye.

    The name of my song is called: Beauty Queen

    This is my verse 1 for Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow:

    Mrs.Gwyneth,Paltrow,I have,known,lots of Thangs,about,Fashion,Babe,you look like,a Beauty Queen,I like your,Movies,Pretty Babe,you should come,See Me,I’m very Passionate,Mrs.Gwyn,how have you Bin?Inside is,lots of love,Babe,for you Girl,in my heart,I’ll make you very happy,Sexy Babe,keep Modeling.

    This is my verse 2 for Sexy Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow:

    Don’t stop,the show,cause excitement,is very pleasant,paint your Toes,Babe,with nail polish,I’m cherishing,I hope,you had a very good day,it’s exciting,living life,at your best,I don’t take,part in contests,unless,it makes me richer,I like your,Figure,Pretty Babe,I will like,to put Rings,babe,on your Fingers,Girl.

    This is my verse 3 for Mrs.Gwyneth Paltrow:

    What’s Popping?your fans,babe,keep Jumping,just,to see,you smile,Babe,Where,you Go,Love,Girl,Follows,Babe,just to,make you Shine,More,in case,you need to,feel cherished,Girl,please read,my song,I’ll make you Strong,I’ll never treat you,Wrong,Babe,Honey,you’re my,Number One,Sexy.