Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Terrell Owens’ Honey Toasted Ego

Terrell Owens Breakfast Cereal

Buffalo Bills wide receiver Terrell Owens has released his very own breakfast cereal– the very cleverly named T O’s. The concept has all the self-promotional appeal of Flutie Flakes, but without any of that bothersome altruism to get in the way.

The ever humble Owens has said that having his “beautiful handsome face” on the cover is better than making it on a box of Wheaties. As for the cereal itself, I’ve heard that it tastes exactly like Honey Nut Cheerios, except with a picture of a jackass on the outside, designed to make you lose your appetite. Maybe some of you Buffalo readers can confirm this for me?

On a related note, is anyone else as excited as I am about football season starting back up? The Hall of Fame game on Sunday is just for show, but it also heralds the start of real football season. It will be interesting to see if you can put the enormous egos of both Terrell Owens and Vince Young in the same place at the same time without ripping a hole in the fabric of the universe.

7 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I am *beyond* happy it’s almost time for real football again!! And I do love me some TO, no matter what team he’s on for two seasons…

  • Ahhh, c’mon Kelly. Lay off poor Vince. He doesn’t suffer from an ego like TO, he suffers from depression. Add to that having just lost his mentor tragically, I’m really cheering for him to do good things this season.

    Oh yeah…and I’m a Longhorn. Still, I think Nashville is giving Vincent a bad rap.

  • I, unfortunately lived in Buffalo for too long, and the people of Buffalo would back a serial killer if he played for the Bills. I do not like T.O. I think he is way overpaid, especially since the housing and job market in Buffalo is horrible. People are losing their jobs left and right and every few months a school is closing. There are over 1,000 applications for just 1 teaching job. There was a job fair a few months ago for 100 jobs, 5,000 people showed up. It is just horrible. The people of Buffalo can barely pay their electric bills, yet they love an asshole who makes 7 +million and was a supporter of Michael “scumbag” Vick. T.O is just another egotistical narcissist and the people of Buffalo are so blinded by their robotic support of the Bills, that it is nauseating.

    As you can see I have no love for T.O. or the stupidity of Buffalonians.

    • Whoa, easy on the Buffalo hating. I’m from Buffalo too, and now live in Michigan, so I’ve definitely seen my fair share of economic depression. However, to group all Buffalonians in such a broad category of “stupidity” is unfair. Buffalo is a great city, with loyal, good people. All we want is something to cheer about and we’ve put a lot of time and effort into supporting the Bills. God forbid we think a future hall-of-famer WR is going to do some good for us. He may be a jackass, but he seems genuinely excited for the season, and who knows what will happen.

  • I really don’t care anything about football but T.O. is one gorgeous, sexy hunk of man! I’d buy the cereal just to look at him as I ate breakfast everymorning.

  • HELL YEAH! i am ready for some football! i got the HD all hooked up. i’ve been waiting for this day since super bowl sunday. go giants!

  • Ugh, both TO AND Vince Young disgust me! TO’s obviously an egotistical bottle of douchebaggery, and Vince is probably the most stupid player in the NFL right now. He’s third string for the Titan’s this year, which is hilarious seeing as the entire UT universe considered (and still considers) him to be a football GOD. My favorite Vince line is from right after UT winning the Rose Bowl (which was excellent, might I add, I am from Texas, and cannot, therefore pull for anyone but a Texas team in a time of need). When asked how he felt about winning the National Championship, utterly intelligent Vince Young replied, “AUSTIN, TEXAS, BABAY!!!” Pure genius. Purely humiliating to Texans everywhere.