Today's Evil Beet Gossip

An Open Letter from Taylor Swift

photo of taylor swift pictures post-breakup photos
Hey guys and gals,

It’s your girl Taylor Swift here, and I just wanted to let you know that I’m, like, totally OK with this Harry Styles breakup thing. I really only used him for publicity, and to push that one photo that one time where I was holding a baby, because seriously: I’ve found that nothing attracts a man better than showing him that you’re a clingy, blonde-haired lady who gives great creep-eye while holding a baby like, “I’m going to be the best baby-mama ever!” And that was really my whole endgame here. I knew that picture would go viral and I knew that there would just be gads and gads of young men and … men who’d be queuing up to be my baby-daddy, so this Harry Styles thing was totally just a cover-up. Ahem. Of course.

So no, I’m totally not bumming over this at all, because surprise! I’m totally already dating someone else and I’m gonna take him home and hug him and kiss him and squeeze him with all my heart and be such a great friend and … where was I? Right. You’ll see who it is in a few days, I’m sure, and you’ll just love him as much as I already do, always and always.

Forever yours,
Bluebells and apple pies and Sunday scohol,
Sunshine and daisies and vintage hats bought on Etsy,

Taylor Swift

6 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Only one clue exposed this letter as a fake: you forgot to add ‘ponies, rainbows & stalking a man ’till he says he loves you <3' to your sign off…the details are important ; )

  • Love it! Hope the one is the ex that everyone has been waiting for. All this drama has always been about them because they never saw it through and they need to. Will be fun to watch the Sparks fly again, nobody will understand her better than him!