OK, brace yourself, guys, because this morning is about to get even more absurd than it already is, what with Taylor Swift getting dumped for the zillionth time in a row.
The latest story is that Justin Bieber‘s f-cking weirdo fans have banded together to cut themselves in an effort to make their favorite popstar stop all the pot-smoking, because duh, like, pot smoking is so, so bad and only scumbags do things like that*.
Things are getting so crazy that even dang ol’ Miley Cyrus is jumping into the fray, calling all of Justin’s fans who are considering cutting themselves stupid and “disrespectful.” From TMZ:
The hashtag #cut4bieber has become the top U.S. trend on Twitter … after people began posting photos featuring bleeding arms, allegedly the result of “cutting” by disappointed fans looking to pressure the singer into giving up his pot habit.
In fact, someone even started a website encouraging Bieber fans to cut themselves and post photos of the carnage …. until Bieber gives up marijuana for good.
But moments ago, Miley Cyrus weighed in on the troubling trend — retweeting a messaging saying:
“#cut4bieber? Cutting is NOT something to joke about. There are people who are actually suffering from self-harm, this is so disrespectful.”
Oh my God. #cut4bieber? Can we maybe change that to “#die4bieber”, because the whole idea of people being so stupid as to cut themselves because Justin Bieber, an eighteen-year-old kid who’s got the world by the balls, wants to smoke pot, kind of makes me want the human race as a whole to just keel over, because guys, we have all apparently failed miserably.
*Only scumbags do not do that. Sure, there are probably scumbags who do smoke pot, but not all people who smoke pot are scumbags. I mean, scumbags work at the bank, scumbags take care of poor, innocent children in daycare centers, and scumbags even teach at University. There are also plenty of people who work at the bank, or who take care of poor, innocent children in daycare centers, and who even teach at University who probably smoke pot and who aren’t scumbags. See? Things are just so diverse—it’s impossible to lump all people into one category and then cut yourself over the category that you don’t like.