Oh my gosh, Lindsay. I can’t even believe that you went to jail for like a week and a half for that DUI, how screwed up was that? And you got in trouble for stealing that necklace, even though you totally just borrowed it? Bullshit. Total bullshit. And now, just when you’re getting into your prime, people are trying to bring you down for fibbing to police and punching someone in the head. It’s like, get a life, justice system!
But for real, things are getting serious this time. Lindsay’s arraignment is on December 15th, and she’s facing “about 253 days” in jail for violating her probation. And obviously she’s not going to be there that long thanks to overcrowding, but she’d still have to serve 25% of that time, which is 63 days. Right around two months, that could probably do her some good, right?
But Lindsay doesn’t even care, because this is all just so unfair. She’s “absolutely freaked out” about going back to jail, and if she “could sell a body part to keep her out of jail, she would.” Oh, girl, how awful this whole thing is for you!
In other Lindsay news, she’s been screaming that the whole fight thing was a setup. People heard her crying after she got released from the police station and saying “I don’t deserve this! It’s not my fault!” People also heard her saying that she was just trying to find her sister’s purse, because – wait for it – she’d given her $10,000 in cash earlier in the evening to take care of her family. And, you know, when someone gives you thousands of dollars in cash, obviously you just stick it in your purse and go out to the club.
What a mess.