Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Hey! It’s Thanksgiving!

What, did you seriously think I was going to let this day (or the next) pass without the holiday’s own theme song? But on a real note, this is the song I’ve been singing all damn day long as I baked pumpkin pies and chocolate cream pies and cracked open rutabaga with my hatchet and mallet and chopped so many onions that my eyes are starting to look all puckered-like and red:

So yeah, Happy Thanksgiving! And make sure you eat lots and lots and lots, because this holiday’s all about being super thankful for everything we get to stick in our pieholes tomorrow, ’cause by God we’re going to live to regret it come Friday morning. Which is when we’ll see your beautiful faces all over again, because believe it or not, there are people out there who care about our malignant asses and want to share the day with us (probably just because we can bake some mean pies and poultry).

Happy Thanksgiving, again, friends, and this year I’ll totally be thanking my lucky stars for all of you, you who I share bits and pieces of my life with on a daily basis. You’re the best readers anyone could ask for, and I’m not being sarcastic—for the first time today.

2 CommentsLeave a comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.