Today's Evil Beet Gossip

James Franco Needs to Shut His Stupid Mouth

A photo of James Franco

Sorry, that headline was inappropriate. It should have read “James Franco Needs to Shut His Very Educated, Very Smart and Impressive Mouth.” Because, as we all know, James Franco is nothing if not way brainy.

Anyway, he needs to shut his mouth because he keeps running it over at Huffington Post. He writes a blog for the site – remember that time that he wrote that thing about how great Kristen Stewart is? So embarrassing, right? Yeah, I don’t know why I don’t read his blog more regularly (probably it’s because my brain would explode), but I wanted to share a few excerpts from his latest entry.

Here’s this big long paragraph where he talks about how he’s really good at teaching because he doesn’t make his students study all the boring stupid stuff that his teachers taught him:

Anyway, I am teaching six classes in all different kinds of disciplines, on both coasts. And I have turned all of the classes — whether they are performance classes, directing classes, art classes, or writing classes — into production-oriented, class-wide collaborations. I love when they make stuff because I can frame each class in such a way that the work can go out into the world. The level of work doesn’t matter because it is an honest portrait of the students. The honesty is primary; the portrait quality of the work makes it feel like a kid’s drawing framed by an adult’s concept. It’s also nice to be able to control the material studied and how it’s talked about. I had so many classes, especially creative ones, where I hated what we were doing or the kinds of material my peers were interested in. In my current position I can guide the subject matter, especially in the classes where I bring in the source material to be adapted.

And here’s a big long paragraph where he criticizes Denzel Washington’s acting, except not really, ha ha:

Turns out that Flight is an addiction film. I had no idea. The editing of the first half is thrilling. Most of the film is spent watching an alcoholic hit bottom. Denzel plays an emotionally destitute man to the hilt, a pilot who drinks and does coke before flying: a pretty risky role to play, putting his stardom on the line. He even shows himself out of shape with his shirt off. It’s pretty cool, realistic; I like it. But he also gets to have two affairs with the most beautiful women possible: a sexy exotic stewardess and a recovering junkie who looks like she was shooting up whole milk instead of heroin, a redheaded girl-next-door type. Denzel’s crumbling drinker also conveniently has an old farmhouse straight out of House and Garden that he can escape to. Oh yeah, and his alcoholism didn’t lead to any problems on the plane; his drinking was incidental to any of the deaths — you see, he is the greatest pilot who ever lived. That’s all to say Denzel plays an alcoholic very well and gives a very vulnerable performance, but he still gets to be the coolest alcoholic hitting bottom who has ever been portrayed.

And here’s a shorter paragraph that’s just him bragging on himself hard.  It’s my favorite:

Hmmmm, what else? My first chapbook came out, Strongest of the Litter, but people seem to be more interested in who I’m dating than poetry. Oh yeah, I got nominated for a National Entertainment Journalism award for these HuffPost blogs, but no other outlet is going to run that story, right? Hahaha — why would Gawker or the New York Post want to publicize that an actor/Yale doctoral candidate is nominated for an award for something that they are doing themselves? I’m pretty proud of it, but I can see why they must hate me.

Honestly, that last little paragraph was the one that got me. “I can see why they must hate me,” that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. Yeah, everybody hates you because you’re just so wonderful, James Franco. When everyone rolls their eyes at you, it’s because they’re just jealous. For sure.

7 CommentsLeave a comment

  • meh, i completely agree with what he said about flight. he didn’t say anything about denzels acting at all. all the things he was critical about were external choices that the director/writer, etc had made. he was being critical about something i think people should be aware of. that that ISNT what addiction generally looks like. when you reach a point where you are drinking on the job (especially things like a pilot) the addiction will have touched other places in your life. you won’t have a house straight out of a magazine. while i think franco is generally a pain in the ass, i like that he is being aware of the portrayal of addiction in the media.

  • Such a douche.
    Since he never attends class and sneers at the lessons others try to teach him, I don’t know how educated he could actually be.

  • Oy. I was at a bookstore and I picked up a collection of short stories he wrote (it was in the sale section, because obviously the world just doesn’t get how brilliant his art is). It was completely insufferable. He is not as talented as he thinks he is.

    Although I definitely have picked up a severe bias against everything he does now. Even if he produces some brilliant art or literature, I won’t be able to appreciate it because every time I hear his name my brain just goes “DOUCHE! DOUCHE!”

    But he earned that.

  • You know what? This is exactly the same thing as those religious freaks who are afraid of science. This breezy pop-culture website is afraid of serious thought. It’s okay to think, and to know stuff that is obscure. Don’t like it? Don’t read it, but there’s no need to shame the guy.

      • Yep, pretty much all this. We’ve ran several stories before about celebrities writing essays that actually were intelligent, and we’ve posted tons and tons of quotables that actually were deep.

        James Franco sounds like he’s deep and thoughtful in passing, but if you really listen to him, it’s, exactly as CAS said, pretentious crap. It’s obvious that he goes out of his way to choose the most impressive words, but that doesn’t make it “serious thought.” The Denzel paragraph was ok, but in the first one he just said that it was neat being a teacher because he gets to pick what they study, because as a student he often hated what the teacher and the other students were interested in. And that’s dumb. And his last line, the “I can see why they must hate me” bit? That’s pretentious as the day is long.

        Also, “don’t like it, don’t read it” doesn’t really work when it’s your job.

        #StrongFeelingsAboutJamesFranco #EvilBeetGossipIsPartlyMyBaby
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