Ok, let’s really set the scene here. Bruce Jenner just, for some unfathomable reason, married Kris. Bruce got the idea in his head to propose to her, ideally to spend the rest of his whole life with her, and to live with her and be with her for always, and he went through with it. Crazy, right? But what do you think Kris could have told Bruce right after they got married? Something sweet, right? Something romantic and touching and incredibly memorable. Right?
Nope. Here’s what she told him:
“I just want you to know, never trust me.”
Wow, brand new wife! What a nice sentiment!
This story was told by Bruce on the most recent episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, and after Kris’ daughters heard it, they decided to give Kris a lie detector test. During the test, she claimed that Robert Kardashian is, in fact, Khloe’s biological father, that she’s never stolen from her daughters during business deals, and that Kim is her favorite. And she passed, you guys. She passed the test.
What an awful human being.