Do you see that expression that Kate Gosselin has on her face right there? That’s her “I swear to God, I swear to God, I do everything for you ungrateful little bastards and you can’t do this one thing for me, this one thing, so see if I ever buy you a goddamn Happy Meal ever again” face. That one thing she wants her kids to do, by the way? Hang out and watch reruns of Kate Plus 8. Yeah, I’d sacrifice a Happy Meal to avoid that, too.
But really, here are a few recent updates from Kate’s Twitter:
We are watching the St Jude’s episode… I am crying… Happy and sad tears.. Old episodes of Jon&Kate+8 warms our hearts…
Wow. We all agreed: we miss our show&the adventures and huge opportunities to help and entertain :)others! Why am I watching and crying??!:)
Those poor kids. They really want another reality show bad, huh? Definitely. I totally believe that two 12-year-olds and six eight-year-olds just love to sit around with their creepy old mom and watch themselves on television, which I’m sure they enjoyed the first time around. Totally.
Now here’s the version with no sarcasm: I wish Kate Gosselin would just shut the f-ck up about this already and quit pretending that her kids want all the same things that she wants. Everyone knows and nobody cares that she’s the one who desperately misses the reality show fame, not the kids. I never thought I’d say this, but can someone please get Jon primary custody here?