We told you guys the other day that Mila and Ashton were caught on an “outing” with all of these friends that never materialized, and then news broke that they had gone away for the weekend in another California town despite the fact that Mila made this official statement that there was nothing romantic going on between Mila and Ashton. And now! TMZ has the photos of their jaunt and it sure looks all romantic and what not to me. For example, this photo:
Mila’s wearing yoga pants. If that doesn’t scream, “I’m getting LAMBASTE LAID and the only thing that doesn’t cause really uncomfortable friction is COTTON and SPANDEX” then I don’t know what does. Then you have this one, which is much the same, just zoomed out:
Also, Mila’s carrying blueberries. You know what blueberries are good for? SEX. They’re chock-full of antioxidants and they’re packed with stuff that is supposed to enhance sexual performance. They’re like natural Viagra. She’s also holding a bunch of sunflowers, and if you’ve never looked up “sunflower” on Urban Dictionary, then you should probably click this link and read the definition, because it’s so sexual that I can’t even post it on the site for fear of losing advertisers. Go. Now. And then come back and look at the rest of these pictures.
The next photo I’ll call ‘Exhibit S’, for ‘sex’, obviously, because the very next day (after spending copious amounts of alone-time together), Mila emerged from a coffee shop with some severe sex hair. No, I’m not saying that Mila had sex in the coffee shop, I’m saying that she entered the coffee shop, probably caught a glance of herself in some kind of reflective surface and said, “F-ck it, they know we’re boning anyway.”:
So they’re definitely having sex. Without question. The coffee confirms it if nothing else.