Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Simpson is Still Pregnant, You Guys

photo of jessica simpson pregnant at wedding pictures photos
How is this woman still pregnant? Really, how? I seriously have to know. Because it seems like she announced her pregnancy years ago (it was really only this past November), but yet there’s no new baby yet. I know she hasn’t done anything interesting in awhile anyway, but I just can’t get sick of her. We literally have five-plus full pages worth of Jessica Simpson-pregnancy fodder, and according to reports, she still might have a few more weeks to go ’til she pops that baby out. Goodness.

This is what Jess had to say on Twitter earlier today:

To everyone who keeps congratulating me on the birth of my baby girl…I’m still pregnant!! Don’t believe what you read ladies and gents.

Also, why have we not seen more beautiful fashion courtesy of a maternal Jessica Simpson? I’m kind of disappointed, to be honest. Ever since I heard she might be launching a clothing line for pregnant ladies, I’ve been studying her ensemble choices very closely. You know, just in case I ever happen to get pregnant again and I need a template for exactly what I don’t want to look like for the whole nine (or in Jess’s case, eighty-six) months of my gestation period.

Anyway, pop that kid out as soon as you can, girl, because I’m certain that this little baby is going to be just as cute and adorable as her mom.

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  • Is that picture recent? Jessica Simpson is so stupid that she miscalculated when she got pregnant. If that picture IS recent, I’m completely shocked. I thought that meat mountain wouldn’t be able to walk by now…just sittin’ in a lounger, scarfing down hot wings with ranch dressing…what does she call it?…oh yeah, “enjoying” her pregnancy. (code for: pregnancy excuse to inhale anything that isn’t nailed to the floor.)