Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Here’s Another Breaking Dawn Part II Teaser for the Three of You Who Still Care

Or am I the only one, my many facets considered a triune of … you know what? What-the-f-ck ever – I like these damn movies, and even though my twenty-one year-old self would be slapping the shit out of my twenty-eight year-old self, there are just some things that you can’t change and guys? This is one of them. Mark it on your calendars. Commemorate it in a scrap book. But you’ve got to tell me: are there any other Twilight fans out there who are excited about this business? Because if I feel like I’m the only one, well, then I’m going to have to start posting Breaking Dawn Part II stuff like it’s my damn job.

One girl I know I can count on to sate her Twilight thirst along with me? This one.

The best part of the video? Her main YouTube page, where it says in the description, “Holy mother of melty shitbags.” Can I borrow that? Use it? Market it, maybe? I love random outbursts of profanity, and while I thought that one I came out with a few years ago while driving down the highway and some schmoe in a fancy Aston Martin blew past me and almost tossed me and my nine-year-old car off the road was the ultimate (“SHITBAG BALLSUCKER!”), this’ll do just fine, my friends. Just fine.

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  • WHY in god’s name do you even like these books and movies? I tried to read the first one, and you know what I found out? If you’re ever in need of firewood, Twilight makes amazing kindling. These books creeped me out. They are basically saying to young women that it’s okay for men to stalk the living shit out of you and break into your home to watch you sleep, and that it’s okay if your first time having sex ends in you being bruised and beaten. I HATE these books, and the movies are worse than any Syfy channel movie I have ever seen. My 11 year-old niece watches the movies, and I’m trying to get her to watch movies with more positive and modern views of women.

    • Mm, I see your point, but the first time I read the books I was twenty-eight years old (real talk: I’ve only just read them over the past year). While I think they’re definitely one of those age-appropriate things that kids and pre-teens definitely shouldn’t be digesting (despite the obvious marketing to those particular groups), they, like anything else, really have to be taken with a grain of salt. I thought they were mildly entertaining at best, and I probably like them even more than I normally would because I have a thing for Kristen Stewart. You do make a good point, however.

      • See? I worry about this, because people whose opinion I trust and respect, like yours or my best friend’s, people who call out sexist bullshit, actually liked the books because they were addictive and somehow attractive. So, if you liked the books, even though you were able to recognise the (VERY) big problems that come with them, how isn’t a young teenage mind, say 12 or 13, who hasn’t had that much experience with books, going to like them? Whatever it is (I haven’t read them), Meyers is compelling and obviously makes a good case, and I think that’s the most scary — that’s such a negative message (if your boy stalks you he loves you! First time sex is okay under violence! If you have sex before marriage you’ll die!) comes with such a convincing, shiny, and attractive package.

      • I definitely think that parents need to either explain how BS the “parallels” are that exist within the book’s themes, or, you know, just closely monitor the things that their young kids read. It’s the same as deciding whether or not to allow your children to watch certain movies with adult plots.

        As for older teenagers, who obviously aren’t going to stand for their parentals micromanaging what they see and read and watch, (or even those who are just more impressionable than others) it’s one of those lesson-learned things, I think. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, and some of the things that we think are the be-all, end-all of the human experience as an immediate post-adolescent can be quite sobering in retrospect, if that makes any sense.