Sofia Vergara is so hot, you know? She’s just magnetic. And if this interview is any indication, it’s because she’s Latina. Yes, not because she’s a woman, and not because she’s got a fiery personality and a humor as sharp as the crack of a whip. No, it’s because she’s from South America, and apparently all South American women are as combustible, attractive, sultry, full-figured, and inspired as Sofia, and that’s apparently why Ryan Gosling is wasting his time with Eva Mendes. It’s because there’s more than meets the eye, and I can’t necessarily negate that (I know, I had a hard time accepting this, too).
Check out some highlights of the interview and jump in for the rest of the photos from the shoot – if you can handle getting through it all, anyway.
On getting wicked mad and then getting over it five minutes later:
The first time it happened, he [my boyfriend] thought, This woman is insane. One time I was screaming with my sister. Then the next day, I told him I was having lunch with her. He said, “How? You were just fighting with her!” … I’m, like, bipolar. … I didn’t even realize it was weird or insane until I came here. It’s not out of the ordinary where I come from. Everybody’s like that. It’s better that way. You forget about what’s bothering you. It’s not like you’re holding it inside, you know? You get it out — and it’s over with.
What the sound level is like in a Latina’s home:
Oh, yeah. We’re very loud. Ed O’Neill tells a funny story: When we were shooting one of the first episodes of Modern Family, our trailers were connected. So if I’m in my trailer screaming on the phone, he can hear me perfectly. I was having one of those “Oh, my God!” conversations with one of my cousins for twenty minutes. As soon as it ended, there’s a knock on the door. It’s Ed. “Sofia, are you okay?” I’m like, “What do you mean?” “I thought maybe you were crying or having a heart attack or something.” “Oh, no. I was just on the phone with my cousin. We were talking about someone else.”
On how the partners of Latinas should just back off and let their women be sexy:
If a Latina falls in love with someone who is insecure, it can be a nightmare. I’ve had girlfriends who’ve been with really jealous guys, and it’s like they’re never enjoying you. You’re at a party and they’re just watching your every move. Then they’ll come over and say, “Why were you talking so closely to that guy? Put your skirt down!” Look, if you’re sexy, if you like dressing sexy, you’re not doing anything more than feeling beautiful. A Latina just wants to walk into a place and feel great. Somebody is going to turn around and look. So a Latina better find a guy who understands that, even appreciates it, because it’s a compliment.
And then what it’s like if a Latina’s partner checks out another woman who’s just as sexy:
That is a completely different thing. He can look, and then turn around. But not like this — Ohhhh! Sometimes the guy is looking …
Jump in for the rest!
… in a way that makes you want to say, “Why don’t you just follow her?” I don’t have a problem with guys looking. It depends on how you look. If a woman in front of you is gorgeous, even the girls will look. But we’re not going to stare. And we’re not going to wink.
On not being all that domestic:
No, I don’t know how to cook. Listen, I didn’t know how to make coffee when I came to the United States. Because in Colombia the maids do it. A mother tells the maids what to cook. The mothers are like conductors of the household. But they’re not really doing it. It’s so different over there. You have the maid that cooks. The maid that irons the clothes. It’s a hard adjustment. When I came to the United States and started working, my priority was not to buy a handbag but to spend my money on the maid and a nanny.
And what a woman should be like in the home:
I always tell my guy friends who are complaining that their Latina girlfriends want a maid: “Listen, this is for your own good. You don’t want a woman who is tired all day long, taking care of the kids, cooking, doing everything. She’ll never be any fun. She’ll never want to go out with you because she’ll be exhausted. She’ll never want to sleep with you. So this is an investment you’re making for your love life. Think of it that way.”
On sex with a Latina:
… All women like to be appreciated and treated with respect and kindness. We all want to have sex in a romantic way. But with a Latina, you’re going to have more fun.
On the skinny bodies that run rampant in the fashion world:
Well, in Colombia everybody’s very voluptuous and you’re supposed to be. You don’t want to be skinny when all of your cousins are mermaids. You grow up thinking that’s how beauty is.
On always knowing what’s right:
Well, we do.
Wow. What a (LATINA) firecracker, huh?