Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Today’s The Day!

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

After what seems like a lifetime of waiting and more promotion than she’s done in ages, the day is finally here: tonight, Lindsay Lohan will host Saturday Night Live. And it’s going to be better than anything this world has ever seen.

Let’s take a moment to learn some more information about Lindsay’s big night, ok?

Lindsay Lohan’s taking her music career to the next level on SNL tonight — TMZ has learned, the actress plans to SING the majority of her opening monologue on the sketch show.

Sources tell TMZ, nothing’s off the table either — Lindsay will poke fun at all the recent mishaps in her life … arrests, endless court dates, necklace-stealing sagas, jail, morgue duty … the list goes on.

But Lindsay won’t be alone on stage — we’re told several cast members will join her in chorus.

Sources tell us, Lindsay wants to show the world she doesn’t take herself as seriously as people think — and actually has a sense of humor about the legal troubles that have plagued her the last few years.

We’re told Lindsay has also extended several personal invites to famous friends to join her on the show — and they unanimously accepted. No word yet on who the surprise guests might be.

Bottom line … Lindsay knows there’s a lot riding on tonight’s performance — so she’s determined to make it one for the ages, practicing non-stop all week long.

She’ll be singing? Wow, what a treat. And she’ll have some of her famous friends joining her, huh? That would include … who, exactly? Is she talking about Ali and Dina? Because I can’t think of any other people that have openly associated themselves with Lindsay recently. Well, there’s her lawyer, I guess. Man, tonight is going to be so entertaining.

Sadly, I don’t think this is going to turn out to be the amazing thing that I’d hoped it would be. Previously, I was all “Lindsay’s making a comeback!” and “Lindsay’s pulling it together!” I’m an optimist, what can I say? Well, I can say that that was all before I actually heard her speak and saw her in action. And believe you me, I take it all back. It is not yet Lindsay’s time to shine.

A couple of days ago, I was skimming through the posts here, checking for comments and making sure everything was looking good, and my boyfriend was looking with me. I came across one of the new pictures of Lindsay, and he said “who’s that?” When I told him it was Lindsay Lohan, he responded with “are you sure?” It was then that I had a major sad, because no, I’m not too sure. Lindsay Lohan was the adorable little girl from The Parent Trap and the funny, gorgeous young woman from Mean Girls. This puffy-faced, budget wig-wearing lady that’s traipsing around L.A. these days? That’s not Lindsay Lohan. Not to me.

Regardless, I absolutely cannot wait for SNL tonight. Anybody else?

2 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I think the worlds been laughing at her rather than with her for so long, that in order to feed some sort of attention seeking need, she’s simply going along with the joke…even if it’s on her.

    I think she’s incredibly pathetic and while I’d like her to get clean and sober, I’d like her to also get some self-respect and maturity.