Feb 07, 2012 at 03:30 pm by Emily

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

Ha ha, but really. In all seriousness, I’m thinking of taking up a collection so that we can get Lindsay Lohan some quality bras. She never wears any because she spends all her money on coke, right? And I don’t want to reward that behavior, but I also don’t want to keep looking at Lindsay’s floppy titties all the time. I’m thinking we’ll pull together some funds on PayPal or something, and one of you out west can take Lindsay to the Victoria’s Secret or what have you, and make sure that she gets the support she needs. Not for her mental health issues, but for her boobs. Sound good?

And no, I’m not done talking about Lindsay Lohan’s breasts.

I’ve always been a busty girl too. I had to wear a training bra in second grade, which led to one of my favorite nicknames the assholes at my school gave me: Big Boob Girl. Ah, kids. But I kept on wearing that bra, and by the time I was 10, I moved right on to my first A cup, which lasted until I was 12, when I moved up to a B. They kept on growing through middle school and high school, and until I was around 21, the only time I ever took my bra off was to take a shower. I couldn’t imagine going into public without one on, and I certainly couldn’t imagine doing a photo shoot without one. To be fair though, that very last part is probably more about Lindsay being a meth mouthed floozy than anything else.

But that’s why these new pictures, a series of photographs that Lindsy did with Terry Richardson, really got to me. These pictures hurt, don’t they? I don’t get how she can ever be comfortable when she’s running around everywhere with her breasts flopping every which way. Does she think it looks sexy? Because I don’t think it does. I think it looks painful and awkward and like you need to put yourself together before you start your day.

Oh, and I looked at all these pictures pretty hard, and I don’t think there are any photos of actual nipple, but if you manage to spot one, go ahead and holler so I can fix that, all right? Also, here’s an extra little game for you: see if you can spot Marilyn Monroe! She’s in there somewhere!

Images courtesy of Terry Richardson’s Diary

10 Responses to “Somebody Needs to Get Lindsay A Bra”

  1. Joey says:

    She’s gonna need a scaffolding for those very soon…

  2. Jen says:

    I really can’t tell if you’re being ironic…

    If not – her breats look great without a bra!

  3. CranAppleSnapple says:

    You’re exactly right! Big boobs HURT when you don’t support them. Hers are saggy and revolting.
    High five in solidarity re: wearing a bra since primary school.

  4. Malia says:

    Seriously. If she doesn’t start giving those boobies some support, then they’re going to be down to her belly button soon.

  5. mama said knock you out says:

    i too enjoy a smoke whilst partying, but feck, put it down for the photoshoot! trash up the ass.

  6. Erin says:

    Call me crazy but the photo of Lyndsay in front of the Marilyn pic couldn’t be more representative of this poor girl’s state of mind slash career, she looks overshadowed, tortured and caricatured. The only thing they really share is a lot of youth and talent gone to waste. Lyndsay could still make some moves, change things for herself, but there she is, looking so stunted.

  7. jenn says:

    oh my god. these photos are so irritating to look at. I had to stop at about the 4th photo. they look so amateur! her poses are redundant and she just looks so desperate for attention. I almost feel badly for her. I’m not trying to hate on her. I actually feel she could still try and make something of herself and she can find the right path and stick to it.

  8. Liseth says:

    Having big breasts and not wearing a bra does hurt. I know from experience. Walking fast or running on a treadmill which I do at home hurts and I have to wear tight gym shirts cuz its more comfortable than using a bra. Anyways I’ll donate lol poor girl can’t afford a god damn bra from wal Mart at least. Not sexy. Saggy boobs r never sexy!!!

    • mama said knock you out says:

      proves she’s high as a kite. she can’t feel those hooters swingin’ around ’cause she can’t feel a thing!

  9. asherhot says:

    bras not needed u look sexy without it

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