Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Michael Lohan Arrested AGAIN (This Time Over a BJ), Faked a Heart Attack, Tried to Escape

Photo: Michael Lohan's mugshot. Lohan was booked Tuesday morning.

Same story, different day: Michael Lohan was arrested in the wee hours Tuesday morning for, once again, trying to beat up his sometimes-lady-friend, 28-year-old gossip journalist Kate Major. According to CNN, authorities responded to a call from Lohan’s Tampa home and immediately arrested Lohan for “battery on his live-in girlfriend,” the police statement said. Most news sources say the call came from Major’s home. Toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe.

When D-Listed reported that this was all over a beej, I thought blogger Michael K was kidding. But Us confirms that the conflict escalated when Major refused to, uh, “go downtown.”

The remaining details outlined in the police report may not be appropriate for workplace-reading.

Apparently, Ms. Major had agreed to drop her restraining order against Lohan. It was in the throes of celebratory make-up sex that the couple began to argue anew, this time—ugh, I can’t make this stuff up, guys—over whether Lohan should have pulled out. (The answer to that, as we all know, is always yes.)

So Kate Major was furious, because she believes Lohan’s penchant for bareback intercourse has resulted in previous pregnancies. (Seriously, it’s in the police report. I’m not sure whether Major actually terminated a Lohan pregnancy, but anyway, good grief.) Oh. Also. Michael Lohan threatened to kill Kate Major, slit her wrists, and/or throw her from the fourth-floor balcony. Then, Major alleges, when she threatened to phone the cops, Lohan pulled a “Situation” and bashed his head into a door, essentially faking an injury so that he could play the role of the victim.

After all that, Major declined to give Lohan a beej. Can’t imagine why.

As TMZ tells it, upon his arrest, everyone’s favorite Showbiz Dad immediately began telling the cops he was suffering from chest pains, so they gave him the benefit of the doubt and took him to the hospital. Then! An officer caught Lohan trying to sneak out of the hospital. Then Lohan was arrested yet again.

Wow. Michael Lohan just might be the worst person ever.

(Mugshot via D-Listed.)

3 CommentsLeave a comment

  • No sympathy for Kate Major at this point. She already had issues with this idiot and still let him in! The only thing he should have had waiting for him if she let him in the door is a bullet.

  • Can society as a whole pull a Jennifer Lopez in “Enough” on this guy?

    Ugh, what a scumbag. No wonder his daughter does meth. She should have a shirt that just says, “Have you met my father?”

    ….”/parents?”

    Also, Kate Major is a twat.

    Thought I’d throw that one in there for good measure.

  • Mike Lohan is a repugnant pig, no good waste of space. He should be locked up for good with nothing to look forward to but a ritual ass plugging from a very large, hairy inmate. Kate is no better, she’s obviously a sloppy, attention seeking drug whore who should know better by now, however, this does not make it right for that pig to treat women or anyone the way he does. Too bad he didn’t meet an untimely demise after Celebrity Rehab instead of Mike Starr.