Sep 27, 2011 at 04:30 pm by Emily

Here’s a video of a Chris Brown performance where he humps the floor, almost kisses some poor fan who happens to be onstage, licks the girl’s knee, and finishes everything up by tugging at his pants as the lights go down. Yeah, it’s probably not as bad as knocking up some poor girl, but visually, it’s an assault, and I would like to know where I can force this wrong to be righted.

Sep 27, 2011 at 03:30 pm by Emily

A photo of LeAnn Rimes

Ok, I know that we go on and on about LeAnn Rimes over here, but trust me, it comes from a place of concern. Concern and incredulity, and yeah, I think there’s a little bit of disgust. But at the end of the day, none of that matters, because LeAnn’s one and only, Eddie Cibrian, still thinks she’s just perfect.

“It bothers me because, obviously, I know she’s healthy. She eats more than I do sometimes. She’s just a very [conscientious] eater, as far as what she eats. She eats pretty healthy, but she works out pretty hard too and she actually takes pride in the way she looks and it’s a shame that people will jump on the bandwagon just because she is fit. And she’s far from unhealthy. She works out like crazy. She works out hard. She boxes. She trains… Whenever you get a picture taken of you, there’s always an angle that looks unflattering for anybody and it’s unfair to use those pictures as the basis of the way that you actually really look. She’s in fantastic shape and very healthy and I love the way she looks.”

What a catch, right? And isn’t it great how all of the things he says make perfect sense? It’s like, duh! All these pictures of LeAnn have just been taken at unflattering angles! And she just works out all the time, that’s not a problem at all! Man, am I sure glad that Eddie cleared all this up, but let me just tell you, I feel like a dunce. A real dunce!

Sep 27, 2011 at 02:30 pm by Emily

A photo of the cast of Jersey Shore

“I’ll do it until I’m in Depends, using a walker and I’m feeding her baby food.”

- Jersey Shore cast member, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, claims that ain’t nothing gonna stop him from being a part of the trashiest show on television, not even an invalid girlfriend and incontinence. Yay, right?

Do you actually think the Jersey Shore kids could last that long? I mean that in many ways: do you think they’ll settle down enough to lose interest in the show, do you think they’ll settle down enough to avoid an overdose, do you think that anyone would want to watch this show for decades and decades and decades*?

*I would.

Sep 27, 2011 at 01:30 pm by Sarah

photo of matthew morrison pictures photos pics

This is what thriving off chlorophyll does to a girl. [The Superficial]

Gwen Stefani and Angelina Jolie go on a playdate. [Bitten and Bound]

Nancy Grace‘s wardrobe malfunction, YES. [Starpulse]

Kate Middleton for Vogue? [Socialite Life]

Oh grade school, I remember you. [theBERRY]

Real Housewives of Atlanta sneak peek. [Bossip]

More Anne Hathaway for Catwoman. [Caught on Set]

Britney with a gun, noooo! [Yeeeah]

Spencer Pratt is BROKE. [The Blemish]

Doritos man to be buried with his chips. [OMGBlog]

Teen model “nearly nude” in magazine shoot. [The Frisky]

Was Ashton cheating on Demi (again)? [Cele|bitchy]

Matthew Morrison‘s kind of a dick. [Hollywood Dame]

Vintage Aniston is laughable. [Lainey Gossip]

Lindsay Lohan‘s dating THIS dude, never mind. [The Superficial]

Sep 27, 2011 at 12:30 pm by Sarah

photo of scott disick pictures photos dick pics

But what happened? Ugh. Just that. Sonofabitch, just that. Here’s the snippet from an interview done by xoJane:

Jane: We’re getting the hook — they’re telling us we’re out of time! Okay, wait — is Kris [Humpries] well endowed? They all think he is.

Kourtney: I would think he is.

Kim: (decidedly not feeling us) I don’t really like questions like that.

Khloe: We got all of the preview of Scott at his parents’.

Kim: Even today. Honestly, it’s way too much. He has to start wearing some tighty-whities.

Khloe: He was wearing pajama pants and no undies and you could see it all.

Kim: So inappropriate.

Kourtney: It’s like an elephant’s trunk.

Kim: You guys!

Please. Let’s pretend that they’re all appalled by the sight – or discussion – of a penis. We’ve all seen the tapes, girls. And the photos. And the interviews. How ’bout we try to not be something we’re just, you know, not?

As for Scott‘s elephant dick, I definitely could have gone an entire lifetime without knowing that information, because it does positively nothing for me except put really gross, unfortunate images into my head that I just don’t need before dinner.

Sep 27, 2011 at 11:30 am by Sarah

Am I the only one not excited about this guy? He’s like a lame Michael Jackson tribute artist, and I’ve seen much better while under the influence of buckets of vodka at resorts in the Caribbean. As for this song being on the Breaking Dawn soundtrack, I understand that the film execs want the most cutting-edge, the trendiest of musical acts, but this Bruno Mars character is a flash in the pan, trust me. I mean, remember the Romeo + Juliet soundtrack that came out in 1996 (I’m dating myself, I know)? It had some KILLER tracks on it. Garbage, Butthole Surfers, Radiohead … solid stuff.

However, Bruno Mars is the Romeo + Juliet equivalent of Gavin Friday’s ‘Angel‘. In fifteen years, people are going to say, “Yup, I remember I liked that song for about a minute. … I was such a cheeseball.”

It’s like that, guys.