Hey, look who’s unearthed herself long enough from geriatric wang to actually show up at an event and do something other than creepy mime stuff! It’s Scarlett Johansson! And she’s looking – still – hot! She’s definitely dropped a few pounds (must be all that running in those stupid toe sneakers that never really caught on), and the red hair is actually pretty hot, so on the whole, I’d say the look is a win.

How do you guys feel about a less-curvy and redder-haired Scarlett?

I know you guys are pretty torn between “Oh how pretty! Kim Kardashian wedding photos!” and “Ugh, this bitch?”, but there’s two – count ‘em two - photos here to satisfy both groups. The upper photo is for the former group – and doesn’t she just look amazing, ladies and gentlemen. Seriously. Plastic surgery or not, this is one pleasing head.

For the latter group, here’s another photo:

What, you can’t find anything remotely amusing about it? Well, how about the fact that step dad Jenner is walking girlfriend down the aisle here and practically no one’s watching?

See? Don’t you just love days when everyone can be happy? Crap, I know I do.

Images courtesy of E Online

The hell? On the heels of her happy announcement last week, Hilary Duff has officially been dropped from her next movie, as TMZ reports, because she’s pregnant.

Duff was slated to play Bonnie Parker in the upcoming Bonnie and Clyde bio-pic, but evidently, producers (or whoever) can’t picture the notorious criminal as having a happy, healthy glow and a great rack (and, okay, maybe a paunch, too).

But what’s the big deal? If you ever watched Ghost Whisperer, you’ll remember that the camera found new, ridiculously fascinating ways to hide Jennifer Love Hewitt‘s hips each week. Why are you so scared of a pregnant lady, filmmakers? Get creative!

As TMZ dutifully points out, people have been sued for less—Hollywood isn’t the “real world,” no, but generally speaking, you can’t fire a lady from a job for being pregnant—and if Hilary Duff really wanted to start some beef, there’s a legal precedent that would probably win her a ton of money.

Wow, I sound kind of mad! I’m not actually that mad, you guys. And anyway, Duff is reportedly totally cool with leaving the production, so there’s also that. Come on, Duff! Where’s the passion, the spark? Suffer for your art! SUE! SUE!

Truthfully, I like Josh Groban. For a while I wasn’t too sure about him—I received a Groban Christmas CD one year, cementing my real and lasting fear of pop opera—but the kid is undeniably funny, funny, funny.

In the clip above, Groban visits Piers Morgan Tonight; there, Groban makes light of Morgan’s overwrought Twitter-tweets by singing them aloud. And seriously, he makes Piers Morgan sound like the lyric book from Les Mis! Ha ha ha!

This isn’t the first time Groban has been high-larious—the Hollywood Reporter cites his guest-star turns on Glee, Robot Chicken, and American Dad, too. But they left out my favorite Josh Groban cameo, from Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! (Yep, it’s pretty weird.)

“Confidence is the only key. I know a lot of people who aren’t traditionally ‘beautiful’ — not symmetrical or perfect-bodied or perfect-skinned. But none of that matters because all that shines through is their confidence, humor and comfort with themselves. I can’t think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself.”

- Emma Stone giving me another reason to love her.

But really, how magical is this girl? I know I haven’t talked about her since July, and I feel just terrible about that, but trust me, she was always on my mind. I just think there’s something so beautiful and refreshing about her, and I’m so excited for her life. And this little quote just makes my heart swell!

Let the Emma Stone love commence!

Ok, before you start being like “oh, this bitch,” let me just remind/tell you that Kim requested that all her wedding guests come dressed in black or white, so she’s not being That Girl who shows up to your wedding in some budget bridal mess. Or, well, if she is, she’s at least sticking to the theme.

Regardless of how cheap the dress looks (it does look cheap, right, that’s not just me?), isn’t it inappropriate to have your basoomas hanging out like that at your pal’s wedding? I’m just assuming, I’ve only been to like two weddings, but I would think if some cracked out bitch showed up at my wedding, trying to upstage me with her admittedly impressive boobs, I’d be like “giiiiiiirl. Girl, no. This is my special day. Get you a shawl.” Would you?

Image courtesy of Gossip Center