Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Geri Halliwell Is Slowly Morphing into A Mermaid

A photo of Geri Halliwell

I know what you’re thinking: “oh, another gallery of Geri Halliwell in a bikini, I get to see some nipples today!” Well, perv, there will be no Ginger Spice nipple action happening on this day, but you get something even better. You get a far-fetched theory involving magic and sea creatures. And really, which one sounds better?

Ok, see, some people might think that since there’s photo after photo of Geri Halliwell playing in the water and rocking bikinis, she must be on vacation. But I say “nay,” for I believe that there are mystical forces in this world that Geri has tapped into, and that she’s using that power to achieve her dream of living out the rest of her days under the sea. The lovely red hair, the steady decrease in relevance – add it all up and it’s clear. We have but a few more precious moments to observe Geri in our world before she descends into the ocean to be where she belongs.

Or, you know, have some pictures of Geri Halliwell looking hot in some swimwear. Whichever.