FROM: Kelsey Grammer
TO: Everybody in Kelsey Grammer’s Address Book
SUBJECT: Camille smells like beef jerkey
EMAIL TEXT: goodnight

Oh, no! Kelsey is so humiliated and completely sorry you received that email last night — the one with the subject line about how his ex-wife Camille smells like beef jerky — but he super-promises he wasn’t the one who sent it.

Eh. Sounds to me like somebody staggered home late at night, fired off a nonsensical email about his ex, and blacked out. Now that’s a story I can identify with.

Nonetheless, Page Six is reporting that Grammer was “hacked” by a “prankster.” That report conflicts with Grammer’s own version of the story, which is so much more banal: although the email account is in Grammer’s name, it’s a “shared account,” and “third parties” can access it.

Grammer emailed his contact list a curt non-apology, writing, “May I suggest it is ‘they’ who owe you an apology.” Did you read it in a haughty Frasier Voice? I know I did.

Whatever. Own your mistake, Kelsey Grammer! If you’re willing to sign your name to anything and everything your friends are sending from “your” email address, you obviously need to find better friends.

What I’m really saying is, stop giving all your passwords to this guy:

(more…)

And something about it makes me think of Michael Jackson‘s ‘The Way You Make Me Feel.’ The whole song, obviously, is way 80s, which – believe it or not – I can kind of appreciate. The video, however, at least in comparison to other Gaga videos, is actually kind of boring.

Compare it to MJs ‘WYMMF’:

Well, alright. I guess they’re not really all that similar unless you consider the alleyway and the ambiance and the ATTITUDE.

Anyway, best part of the video? The appearance by the E Street Band’s Clarence Clemons. He’ll be the one playing the BADASS SAXOPHONE.

What do you think of the Lady’s latest?

OK, so it’s here at last – the real, final Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Pt. 2 trailer, and it’s ABSOLUTELY BREATHTAKING. I’m not kidding, guys, and you can laugh all you want, there were tears (alright, just one, but it was a BIG one).

It all ends next month – are you ready? Moreover, can you handle this?

See, kids, this is why you don’t start relationships with your boss. Because then things get all complicated and you freak out because he’s approximately eight million years older than you and then he gets you a sweet cover for his porno mag, then totally embarrasses you on it by referencing a Julia Roberts movie.  And, like, how are you ever going to face your friends after this?

You guys, I legitimately feel sick over this.  Is that bananas?  I feel physically ill that Madonna, star of such masterpieces as Swept Away and Body of Evidence, is going to be a guest on Inside the Actors Studio.  Madonna is going to be used as a tool to teach the youth, the children that will be the future of acting.  No matter how many times I say it, it doesn’t make it ok.

Am I reacting too emotionally to this news, or do any of you think this is absolutely ridiculous as well?

“I know what everyone was saying. And during that Grammy moment, when I nearly collapsed, I was thinking, Are you kidding me? I’ve always been really good with my heels. Even pregnant, I could perform in heels. Note to self: Never wear a train onstage. My heel got caught in my train, and if it wasn’t for Jennifer Hudson, who picked me up as I went down, I would have fallen to the floor. When it happened, it was just like, What else, God?! What else?! I threw my hands up in the air and started smiling, because what else could go wrong?”

Sure, Christina, it was the train that made you trip. And when you got arrested for being drunk in the passenger seat of a car, you were a victim. No really, that’s what she calls herself in this interview, a “victim of celebrity.”  I would have pegged her for a victim of Jagerbombs and low self esteem, but perhaps that’s just me.