Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Roseanne Will Cut You

Roseanne Wrapped in a Grey Blanket in New York Magazine

Anyone who knows me knows that I live for Roseanne. I still watch repeats of her show on TV Land almost nightly and my DVR is chock full of episodes for when I’m going through a rough time. There’s never been anyone quite like her, and if you read her new piece in New York, you’ll learn that, as far as she’s concerned, there never will be.

The entire thing is an absolute must-read that I’ve forwarded to half the people I know, but if you want a taste of one of the better parts of the essay, check out this paragraph regarding her struggles to get some authentic-feeling wardrobe:

I grabbed a pair of wardrobe scissors and ran up to the big house to confront the producer. (The “big house” was what I called the writers’ building. I rarely went there, since it was disgusting. Within minutes, one of the writers would crack a stinky-pussy joke that would make me want to murder them. Male writers have zero interest in being nice to women, including their own assistants, few of whom are ever promoted to the rank of “writer,” even though they do all the work while the guys sit on their asses taking the credit. Those are the women who deserve the utmost respect.) I walked into this woman’s office, held the scissors up to show her I meant business, and said, “Bitch, do you want me to cut you?” We stood there for a second or two, just so I could make sure she was receptive to my POV. I asked why she had told the wardrobe master to not listen to me, and she said, “Because we do not like the way you choose to portray this character.” I said, “This is no fucking character! This is my show, and I created it—not Matt, and not Carsey-Werner, and not ABC. You watch me. I will win this battle if I have to kill every last white bitch in high heels around here.”

That might read as crazy to some of you, but sometimes crazy is what you need to be to get your voice heard. It’s worth losing your fucking mind over something you believe in.

Roseanne fought tooth and nail to get her vision taken seriously and make her show the number one hit that she always hoped it would be. Yes, I devour my Real Housewives too, but we can’t ever forget that those are the dessert and a show like Roseanne is the meal.

She also touches on some important and interesting stuff about Charlie Sheen’s recent battle with the creators of Two and a Half Men and cites Dave Chappelle as someone she admires for having the courage to walk away in the face of a bajllion dollar deal. Like I said, this whole thing is a total must-read.

5 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Saw your post on facebook…went and read the article. I sure wish there were more people like Rosanne in the world! Thanks for posting!

  • I love her show, too – but threatening people with scissors? Come on. I might be a fan of the fictional Roseanne Conner, but a woman who treats other people this way (oh, because the fate of the world rests on your ability to make this show the way you want)? Please. You should only be allowed to be that big an asshole if someone’s standing in the way of you curing freakin’ cancer, not making a sitcom.