Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Attractive Dudes: The Rapper Edition

Hey, friends!  So the weekend before last, you might remember that I made a list of my favorite attractive dudes and let you guys vote for who you thought was the hottest.  That was fun, wasn’t it?  Some of you got my taste, which I appreciated, and some of you thought I liked some gross dudes, which is also fine, but one of you suggested that we play this game again with themes (thanks, Lisa!).  And that’s what this is. Same rules as last time, just with fewer contestants and more specificity.  Ready?  Let’s do this.

5.  LL Cool J

Technically speaking, LL Cool J is one of the more physically attractive guys on this list, but since he’s the only one whose music I don’t listen to regularly, he gets number 5.  But you guys, look how beautiful he is.  And remember when he was on that one episode of House? I don’t know about you, but I was like “Hugh Laurie, save that poor man, for he is too beautiful to die so young.”  And don’t even get me started on Deep Blue Sea.

4.  Jimmy Pop of The Bloodhound Gang

Stick with me, you guys.  Because you know that funny guys can be extremely attractive.  And that’s the case here – Jimmy Pop is hilarious, it’s as simple as that.  Well, that, and in this one Bloodhound Gang song, Jimmy sings “I would show up for our pottery class dressed like a pirate with John Waters mustache on a unicorn that shits your name in the stars.”  And if you know me at all, you would know that that’s probably the most amazing thing I could ever hope to hear.

3.  Will Smith

Will Smith has always been and will always be just short of being too gorgeous to exist in our universe.  Sure, he’s had his questionable moments, but, uh, he’s the Fresh Prince.  Do I really need to explain myself further?

2.  Eminem

I have really strong feelings about Eminem.  I mean, I think he’s a good-looking guy, obviously, and I love his music (though the last album I got was The Eminem Show, I still blast “Sing for the Moment” after a rough day), but he’s a little closer to my heart than that. The only reason I listened to Eminem instead of putting the Backstreet Boys or whatever on loop is because my brother told me to. I remember being this little 12-year-old, hanging out with my older brother while he got high or drunk or whatever and explained to me how important Eminem was, and I listened.  I don’t get to see my brother anymore because of a series of bad life choices on his part, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love him or that I still don’t get choked up when iTunes decides to play “The Way I Am.” But yeah, cute dude, huh?

1.  Tupac

Oh my god, you guys.  Where do I even start with Tupac? When I was little, my sister had this mesmerizing poster of Tupac in her room, and she let me borrow his Greatest Hits album when I was about 13, which I never gave back (thanks, sis!).  And I put that album on my computer a couple of months ago, and let me just say that nary a day goes by when I don’t listen to a little “Life Goes On” or “Changes” and sing his praises to anyone who will listen (usually Facebook or the puppy).

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