So of course I don’t expect everyone to look like Heidi-fucking-Montag whenever they go out in public, and especially not to the gym, but little Miley Cyrus here? Looks fucking awful. She looks like she’s been out on a week-long vodka bender that she’s just now trying to sweat out. She looks like she could use another couple hours of sleep, and not, you know, on the floor of some dude’s bathroom at Chateau Marmont.
Plus, the Joan Jett and the Blackhearts tee? Gee, where’d you get that, Miley, the Rave?
There’s our girl Snooki, above, rocking the ill-fit bikini-and-tunic-that’s-really-a-shirt look, and you know what? Though I don’t like the girl for her antics on Jersey Shore, I have to admire her for her whole ‘throw caution to the wind‘ attitude toward what people think about her. That is one thing I can appreciate in, heck, almost anyone. Snooki, +1.
Incidentally, did any of you know that the old girl was going to be on WWE? No? Here’s the video. And I’m sorry, I was only able to watch the first thirteen seconds of it because I think WWE is, one, terribly trashy, and two, I really didn’t think anything could make Snooki look any cheaper than she already does aside from being altogether naked. Snooki, -1, maybe -2. Guess we’re back to ground zero, friends.
So what does one who lost their spot in the limelight do to try and salvage a career before they realize that you have to pay into your own 1099 wages so that they count for Social Security benefits? They rerecord an old song, try to make it their own, and ride the coattails on that for awhile to let a little bit more dough roll in so that they can go back to semi-retirement, and recommence chastising themselves for not knowing when to hold it, fold it, or shut the fuck up.
In this case, Natalie’s gone and redone The Beach Boys’ epic song, ‘God Only Knows,’ for Season 5 of Big Love, and boy do I love Bill Paxton. But regardless, girlfriend can sing, and I really do heart this song.
What do you guys think? Did you forget about Dre Natalie Maines, too?
Gottfried, who’s always had the funny voice, but oddly enough, never been funny, was officially released from his duties late Monday night. According to the insurance company’s VP:
“Gilbert’s recent comments about the crisis in Japan were lacking in humor and certainly do not represent the thoughts and feelings of anyone at Aflac. Aflac Japan – and by extension, Japan itself – is part of the Aflac family, and there is no place for anything but compassion and concern during these difficult times.”
Well said. I mean, let’s get real here: the quake that rocked Japan was upgraded from an 8.9 to a 9.0. It’s one of the biggest on record in modern history. The quake MOVED THE ISLAND OF JAPAN thirteen FEET. The earth now spins on an axis that’s been calculated to be four inches different than what it was a few weeks ago, over a half-million people are displaced, the death toll is rising, the number of missing is astronomical, and there’s the very real possibility that a nuclear meltdown may occur at not one, but a couple, of reactors in the area. This disaster is one of epic proportions, and the loss of humans, quality of life, and damage to infrastructure almost goes beyond my comprehension. My heart is broken for these people, all of whom I do not even KNOW.
I am sickened, saddened, and appalled at the way a comedian – even a sub-par comedian – could try to capitalize off of this type of circumstance, because guys? There’s nothing fucking funny or lighthearted about ANY of it.
When a big news event goes down, it’s only a matter of time until comedians and plebs alike start cracking jokes, but I think pretty much everyone would agree that it’s far too soon to start making fun of the 8.9 earthquake that happened in Japan on Wednesday. Still, that didn’t stop comedian Gilbert Gottfried from making over twelve jokes about the catastrophe on his Twitter feed this weekend, not even a full week after it happened.
Don’t get me wrong: I love comedy as a means of catharsis, I think it’s one of the most important tools that we have as humans, but yo! They’re still finding dead bodies and attempting to rebuild over there. On top of that, the jokes aren’t remotely clever, original or interesting.
Do you find Gilbert Gottfried’s jokes about Japan to be offensive, or do you think that a little bit of brash humor is exactly what we need to get through this tragedy?
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