Jennifer Love Hewitt is just the best.  There’s no two ways about it.  This girl has killer fashion sense, helps the world with her solid dating advice, and as an actress, she can’t be beat. With all that knowledge, it’s no surprise that she’s way into one of the hottest dudes in the world, Robert Pattinson.

Here’s Jennifer’s story:

“I love Edward,” Jennifer told Billy and his Access Hollywood Live co-host Kit Hoover, earlier this month. “I actually waited in line to take a picture with him after the very first premiere for like an hour and 15 minutes and as I got up to take my picture, they were like, ‘Rob are you tired?’ and he’s like, ‘Yes,’ and he left. And I was standing there like, ‘Are you kidding me?’ Forty women from Milwaukee got their photo, but not me.”

Ok, it’s been a long weekend and all that sarcasm is weighing heavy on my heart, so let’s just break this little story down real quick.  Do you think that if it was 1998 and Jennifer was in the midst of I Know What You Did Last Summer and Can’t Hardly Wait that she’d have to wait behind forty women from Milwaukee at a public premiere to meet Robert Pattinson?  I doubt it.  But it’s not 1998, and Jennifer Love is no spring chicken, and I find all this incredibly sad.

You just keep on keepin’ on, Jennifer. I hope you love Breaking Dawn. You deserve that much.

“I’m a Belieber.”

- Johnny Depp revealing his love for the Biebz during a press junket for Rango.

If anything, this news is proof of the power of prayer, positive thinking, and a number of hours dedicated to creating the perfect voodoo dolls.  If you dream this big, you guys, then you too can experience the beautiful union of two of your very favorite celebrities.  To quote the great R. Kelly, “If I can see it, then I can do it.  If I just believe it, there’s nothing to it.”

Now that Johnny has joined the powerful Bieber army, are your minds changed at all?  Are you feeling a loss of respect for Johnny Depp, or perhaps an epiphany, a great spiritual awakening to a world in which you never thought you could belong?

I don’t know, maybe I’m just overly critical of red carpet fashion, or maybe it’s the pearl-clutching Southern girl in me, but there was a Pre-Grammy gala yesterday, and a lot of people just looked trashy.  It looks like someone sent out a memo to the ladies that the theme for the gala was “Dumb, Slutty, or Animal Print,” and everyone just went with it except Jennifer Hudson, because she’s too classy for that, Kathy Griffin, because she doesn’t give a fuck, and Jordin Sparks, because she’s not relevant enough to warrant a memo.  I’m right, right?

Today’s exercise for the K-Y Intimacy Experiment was cooking together. If I may say, I’m a banging cook – I can make anything from the perfect soufflé to your basic chicken and ham pie. I kind of pride myself on my cooking, and to allow just anyone (husband included!) to cook in my gourmet kitchen – it’s gotta be for a good reason, guys, like I’ve become bedridden or, you know, for this experiment.

What did we make? A huge, homemade pot of spaghetti sauce, complete with sausage and meatballs. We didn’t go fancy – it’s the middle of February. Rib-sticking comfort food is kind of where it’s at, especially since it’s been so COLD as of late. The experiment called for oysters as a first dish (loaded aphrodisiac cliché), but I think oysters are disgusting, no matter how you slice it – pun totally intended. Sorry! The experiment also called for asparagus, but after I had my heart set on spaghetti and meatballs, asparagus didn’t really seem like a good pairing (though I did make it a few weeks ago, brushed with olive oil, a bit of sea salt, and cracked peppercorns and then broiled and it was uh-mazing). However, the suggested red wine and dark chocolate was to die for, and I’m glad we went the extra mile to incorporate those two into the meal.

We both ate enough to collectively rupture something, and as far as I’m concerned, if I can be honest, after the heavy spaghetti-and-meatballs dinner, the dark chocolate pie and two glasses of red wine? I’m more apt to want to sleep than to try and be all sexy. It’s not every day that I can take advantage of being this comfortable and relaxed on a Saturday at 8 PM.

Anyway, statistics show that 58 percent of couples who cook together on a regular basis are more satisfied with their sex lives than those who don’t – whether it has to do with the bumping and grinding that, you know, sometimes goes on during garlic mincing or egg-beating, who knows, but there’s definitely something to it, and previous instances suffice as creed.

Don’t forget – you guys have two days to enter for a chance to win your own K-Y Intimacy Kit, including a guidebook that’s just chock-full of all sorts of super suggestions to spice up your relationship – especially for this time of year!

Also, be sure to check out K-Y’s Facebook page, Couples Place, for further information on upcoming trials, and chances to win other cool stuff from K-Y!

I wrote this posting while participating in a blog campaign on behalf of K-Y^® Brand and also received product samples to help facilitate my review. In addition, K-Y^® Brand sent me a gift card to thank me for taking the time to participate.

You guys have played that wonderful classic, “Marry, Kill, Fuck,” right?  If not, it’s pretty easy:  someone names three people (or things or places, but that’s more for advanced and/or drunk players), and you decide which one you’d marry, which one you’d kill, and which one you’d fuck.  It’s one of my very favorites, so I thought I’d play with you guys, you know, in order to enhance our relationship and learn more about one another.

Here are your choices:

1. Charlie Sheen.  This guy definitely knows how to party. With him, you could stay up for days, just hanging out and jamming to Train.  And hey, if he can afford to put gold in his mouth, he can afford to put gold on your finger.  On the downside, there’s a good chance he’d ruin Christmas by pulling a knife on you.

2. Jesse James.  Ok, the thing with Jesse is that he has a definite type, so if you’re not super trashy, covered in tattoos, or at least a brunette, things probably wouldn’t work, even in the imaginary sense.  And if you’re Jewish, you also probably want to move along. Good news though:  Jesse’s almost on wife number four, so he’s got to be really good at romancing a lady!

3. Scott Disick.  Now this fella here knows about fashion, and that’s a definite plus.  I’m sure you could spend your days roaming around fancy shops without a care in the world unless, of course, you’re marginally heavier or less attractive than Kourtney Kardashian, in which case you’d constantly hear things like “You’re disgusting, I would kill myself if I looked like you! Look at you, you whale!”

So what will it be, friends?

Yesterday was Jennifer Aniston’s 42nd birthday – did any of you take the time to send her a card?  It’s ok, I didn’t either, I was too busy trying to find someone to go with me to see the new Justin Bieber movie, but you know who did take that time? Jake Gyllenhaal. He took that time and then some.

Last night, the two were spotted having dinner together, along with a few of Jennifer’s other pals.  The extra friends aren’t important though, because according to some witnesses who reported quick to Life & Style, the night was all about Jake and Jennifer (alliteration is a sure sign that a couple’s going to work!):

“Jake and Jen looked really happy and really seemed to be enjoying themselves,” an eyewitness tells the Scene Queens. “They looked like they were strategizing a way to exit the restaurant probably because they didn’t want to be photographed together.” Shortly after their discussion Jen exited the restaurant with her friends in tow. Though Jake was not in the group, it is possible he could have snuck out the back door while no one was looking.

This romantic birthday dinner only adds fuel to the fire that Jen and Jake’s longtime friendship could be something more. The duo was spotted just weeks ago at a pre Golden Globes party in L.A where they were flirty. Despite their 11-year age difference, Jen and Jake have had a strong bond since they filmed The Good Girl in 2002. “We took care of each other,” Jen has said about Jake. While the timing may have been off in the past, both Jake and Jen are currently single. “Jen and Jake looked very comfortable with each other,” the eyewitness tells us. “They were glowing.”

There’s a pretty high possibility that this isn’t anything at all. Jennifer does play the field a lot – just last month, she was supposed to be in love with Adrien Brody – but I kind of hope this one turns out to be for real.  What about you guys: