…because I’d really love to know. There has to be some good reason that this grown woman in bedazzled Uggs is hanging off her elderly husband, ass popped out in the air like she’s getting paid for it.

These two classy folks were snapped yesterday on their way to get some lunch. The rest of the pics are just as good. (more…)

DigitalSpy told us this morning that Brad Pitt is in talks to play John Lennon in the upcoming biopic, Daily Express. And get this: Instead of using the original music, Brad is planning on singing the songs himself. This is all, for whatever reason, with the blessing of Yoko Ono, who recently met and loved the actor.

But, for what it’s worth, whatever source spoke to DS about the project made it sound like Brad Pitt is going to try and beat this role up:

“Brad already has a writer working on the script. And Yoko has given the project her blessing so long as it’s true to John’s life,” an insider is quoted as saying.

“Brad wants to do all the singing himself and plans to take voice lessons. If he can’t pull it off they’ll use John’s own voice. Brad has also been immersing himself in videos and books so he can get Lennon’s mannerisms down pat.”

I guess I could see this going either way. On one hand, Brad Pitt is kinda the Susan Lucci of the male Hollywood film actor set. Check out his Wiki, man. He’s been nominated a bajillion times and has never won. Ever. Maybe this is the Oscar-bait of a role he needs to snag that award he arguably deserves. How have we given Sandra Bullock, whom I love, an Oscar, but not Brad Pitt?

And then part of me thinks that no one is totally qualified to play John Lennon. Maybe they should do what they did when they needed someone to play Jesus Christ and just find some rando.

Another hint:  if you didn’t get that hint in the title, you’re probably not going to care about this news.

For those of you living in your sweet cave with the WiFi, the Notorious B.I.G. was shot and killed back in 1997.  Thanks to some pretty successful dickin’ around (conspiracy theories are welcome in the comments), the case was never solved.  Well, hold on to your hats, you guys, because here we go again.

From CNN:

“A task force made up of local and federal law enforcement agencies is actively pursuing leads into the 1997 slaying of hip hop artist Christopher Wallace … According to one law enforcement source, the investigation into the 13-year-old unsolved case was ‘reinvigorated’ months ago as a result of new information, but the source would not elaborate further because of the ongoing investigation that includes the Los Angeles Police Department, L.A. County District Attorney’s Office and the FBI.”

Did you catch that last part?  The FBI.  They got involved for, like, a year back in 2004, but then I guess they had to investigate some talcum powder in an envelope or something and closed their case.  But that doesn’t matter now, because now they’re in it to win it, and we better finally see some justice for Biggie (East Coast represent).

Ok, I want to know three things from you guys:  who do you believe killed Biggie (I think I’m going to go with Voldemort), what’s your favorite Biggie song (“Hypnotize” for sure), and who’s better, Biggie or Tupac (does it discredit this entire post if I say Tupac?).  Now you go.

Whooooo wants to see Adam Levine’s penis? [The Superficial]

It’s a possibility that LeAnn Rimes and Kate Gosselin are the same people, guys. Here’s the proof. [The Superficial]

Miranda Kerr goes into labor! [Celebitchy]

Britney Spears’ new song comes out Tuesday – hear it here first! [Too Fab]

We might actually know who killed Biggie soon. Can you believe it? [TMZ]

Want to see naked photos of J Woww? There out there. [Amy Grindhouse]

And use small words, because after seeing this photo of Ben – acting like this on an ice cream outing with his family – I’m kind of fried out on being all intellectual and analytical this morning. The only things cycling in my brain right now are nappy beards, little penises, and Boston accents.

I know that this guy is a total asshat and makes no bones about being perceived as a complete toolkit in public (though I still totally would have shagged him ten years ago), but adding ‘being an embarrassment to in front of his family‘ to the growing list of acting a fool?

God, dude. Jen must be so proud.

So Jaime Pressly was thrown on lockdown the night of the People’s Choice Awards for blowing what was rumored as twice the legal limit in California (and guys? That’s a fucking lot.) and here is her glorious, glorious mugshot.

See kids, allow this to be a lesson: this is what happens to celebrities on their way out – I mean, come on. My Name is Earl has been over for ages. Girlfriend was probably so ripped up over being snubbed at the awards show again this year that she got in the car with a bottle of Jack and and a bottle of Banker’s Club vodka and said, ‘Fuck all of you … I’ll make this night about me no matter how much shitty liquor I need to suck back and embarrass myself with.’

It was too bad, though, that she forgot to pretty up before getting pulled over – jaundice-colored blonde hair, greasy roots, and eye bags the size of her implants? Ugh. She totally could have done better.

If nothing else was, at least her eyebrows were a win.