Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Britney Spears: Comic Book Hero!

A photo of Britney Spears

Are any of you guys comic book nerds?  If so, get ready, because in March your Justice League* will get a brand new member – none other than Ms. Spears herself.  Let’s check out her storyline:

“Britney Spears — the most famous superstar of the 21st century. What does it take to reach those heights in the Internet Age? What are the hidden costs when every move makes the headlines? More than an entertainment powerhouse. More than a dancer and musician. Britney Spears is a survivor!”

Interesting angle, that “survivor” business.  If it were me, I’d have gone a much more Incredible Hulk-esque route.  Like there would be a couple of pages of Britney in the Mickey Mouse Club, and then in the whole “…Baby One More Time” era, and there would be a major emphasis on how adorable and innocent she was.  And then, in lieu of any gamma ray accidents, there would be a Justin Timberlake semen accident (this opens the door for spin-offs, see?), because Justin Timberlake’s semen is so powerful that it alters the DNA.  I’m not going to spoil the rest of the story for you, but rest assured that there would be panels of “Umbrella!  BAM!  BIFF! ZOWIE!”

What would you want to see included in Britney Spears’ comic book?

*Settle down, nerds, I know Britney’s not DC.

3 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Just now, in the shower, I was imagining how, as an English teacher, I would explain the archetypal hero’s journey by mapping out Britney’s life. It SO works.

    And yes, I *am* aware of how both gay AND nerdy that is. I’m a gay nerd. It’s what I do.

  • im sorry but when Bluewater dumped the turds that are the Palin and Stephanie Mayer “comics” i lost a lot of faith in smaller publishing houses for comics, and i dislike how the advertise they sell at Things From Another World i know the shop owners in the Portland area don’t carry this shit…..well maybe the better of the female force books about women doing t