Some people just can’t be pleased. Sometimes, guys, the world is just not enough.

Kim Kardashian is one of those people. She’s currently a home-video star, a budding businesswoman peddling perfume, cosmetics, a potential clothing line enthusiast, and in-demand hair-flippin’, partying socialite. Now? She wants to become a successful recording ar-teest, too.

Kim is said to be pairing up with The-Dream (and you know how I feel about this dude) to record some tracks for a Kardashian album. According to those involved in the project (as in yes, the project that’s already been started; this is no rumor), Kim’s got a voice to match her ass – and by ‘voice to match her ass,’ I clearly mean ‘fabulous.’

So, OK, Kim. Congratulations. I’m sure your music isn’t going to be anything that I’m really into, but hey. One could … ‘dream,’ heh.

Good luck, girl!

That, and here’s a clip to give you just a taste of what you’re getting into, readers.  Good stuff.

And here we have Miley Cyrus in the performance of her life – at least, uh, as far as I’m concerned – whilst starring in Rock Mafia’s latest video for their new single, ‘The Big Bang.’

The video, in case you can’t watch it, or well … follow it, involves a man (Keven Zegers) lamenting the loss of his dead girlfriend (portrayed so keenly by Miley), and he sees her – and the vehicle accident that killed her – everywhere.

Miley steams up the camera in a few scenes where she overtly locks lips with the attractive Zegers (and who the hell is this Rock Mafia band, anyway? Never heard of ‘em, but then again, they don’t really have the sound I’m into anyway) and struts her stuff in tight, short leather getups and lots of lace, nailpolish, and bangle bracelets.

Classic Miley, classic doings. It’s just so much better now that she’s going to be legal to do it, without the speculation and constant shoulder-tapping of the Parents Television Council.

What did you think of the video? Too hardcore, or just right for Miley the, um, rocker?

According to sources close to the star (who is now eighteen and can do what she pleases, thankyouverymuch Disney), Demi Lovato has given up her world tour along with The Jonas Brothers and has checked herself into a rehab-type facility, where it’s said she’ll undergo counseling for physical and emotional issues. A rep for Lovato quickly – and loudly – refutes any claims that Demi is, or will be, treated for drug or alcohol abuse.

According to TMZ, however, who always seems to have those extra deets, it sounds like girlfriend might be in the clutch of some serious anger issues, too – TMZ spoke candidly to some close to Lovato, and these moles claim that the catalyst that sent Demi to treatment was a recent physical altercation with a female co-worker on her tour with the Jo Bros.

While it’s never been a secret that Demi has had some issues – she publicly admitted to having self-esteem issues prior to becoming a Disney star (she spoke out against bullying in school), and some photographs also surfaced over the past couple of years which insinuated that Demi was a ‘cutter.’

Even MTV, who have thrown their hats into the mix, claims that Demi has now been hospitalized for an eating disorder coupled with her penchant for cutting, and reiterated the fact that Demi was once bullied in school – which took a serious toll on her fragile self-awareness.

Demi’s rep released an official statement on the status of the star, and claimed that this is a deeply personal time for Demi and her family:

“Demi has decided to take personal responsibility for her actions and seek help. She is doing just that. Demi and her family ask that the media please respect their privacy during this difficult time. She regrets not being able to finish her tour, but is looking forward to getting back to work in the near future.”

There you have it, folks. Best wishes to Demi and a speedy recovery through all of her issues. This is a talented (and rather lovely) young girl who’s smart enough to deal with her problems head on, instead of anesthetizing herself with the readily-available drug and alcohol of today’s society. Let’s just hope she can get better and move on from this.

I think this is really Russell’s tragedy, so let’s focus on him when we think about this tale.

After Russell and Katy got married last weekend, the couple went to the Maldives for their honeymoon.  Sounds nice, right?  But wait. See, the very first day there, Katy went and got bit by a spider, and the spider bite led to a rash, and the rash made her go to a doctor, and the doctor gave her a medication that apparently made her “tired, drowsy and unable to consummate the marriage.”

On top of all that, Katy enforced a “no more sex before marriage” rule two weeks before the wedding.  Assuming we can believe this story, and assuming that Russell Brand has truly left his promiscuity behind him, this means that Russell Brand has not had sex in roughly three weeks.  I think this another sign of those End Times that I keep talking about.  Sleep with one eye open, guys, that’s all I’m trying to say.

Shaq was out celebrating the holiday with everyone else last night and he documented the occasion and his drag costume by treating us to a lip dub of Beyonce’s “Sweet Dreams” AKA one of the best songs of our time.

No, he doesn’t know most of the words, but he pushes through almost the entire song, dancing with his hands and snapping his neck.

Shaq’s the best.

Which extremely beautiful and extremely famous woman is silly-hearted enough to pull off wearing this Transformers (I guess?) get-up for Halloween?

Find out (and see more photos) after the jump!

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