Cher was on David Letterman’s show the other night and one topic that came up was her daughter, Chaz. Chaz used to be Chastity until she underwent gender reassignment story and started living as a man. Cher hasn’t always been the most supportive mother so her the explanation she gave Dave about her daughter’s current state has been ripped apart the last couple days.
Here’s what Cher said:
‘She was a lesbian. She still is. But it’s not the same now. She has a beautiful girlfriend. But it’s not the same thing as being a homosexual, you feel as if you’re in the wrong body. I was saying to someone the other day, I really like being a woman, I feel so comfortable in my body, and if I woke up and I was in a man’s body, I’d think oh my god, I’ve got to get out of here. And that’s the way Chas felt, it was never comfortable. He’s very comfortable now.’
OK, so I can understand why people might be pissed off that she called her daughter both a he and a she in the interview, but guys… Cher is like, old. And she’s Cher. Do I think it’s right that she hasn’t managed to figure out what gender her daughter is addressing herself as by now? Not really. Ironic considering how large her gay fan base is? Totally. But I can also see why this older woman who kind of lives in a bubble of her own fame would have a hard time nailing down all the trans-friendly terminology out there. It’s not easy!
I’m not saying that Cher didn’t mess up, but I think we should ease up on her until someday our own daughters come to us and tell us they’re living in the wrong body. Then we can see how second nature referring to your female child as a male is and judge as harshly as we want to.
Molls, It is disrespectful to refer to chaz as “her daughter” and “she”. If Chaz identifies with being male then you should respect that and refer to him as such. At least Cher had it partially correct.
i agree with keevy06. chaz is “her son” & “he”, not “her daughter” & “she”. respect chaz’s gender & refer to him with correct pronouns.
While I agree she should be addressing him as her son, it’s probably a VERY difficult process to change those pronouns. He was her daughter, a she, for how many years before the surgery? I imagine it’s not intentional, but a slip of the mind that difficult to be conscious about. She probably has to catch herself and her thought process a million times a day, so a few slips here and there are going to happen.
Pronouns are not nearly as important as your mothers love and support is.
The rest will come in time. Cher is still saying goodbye to her daughter and she gets to now know her son
i agree 100%. i thought what she said was well-spoken and compassionate, the pronouns were just helping her tell her story.
Exactly. Cher gave birth to, and raised a girl. It’s not like this has been easy for her either. After using the phrase “she” or “her” for 30+ years, it’s just not going to happen overnight.
At least she still loves and accepts her child, which is more than a lot of parents could or would do in this situation. Shouldn’t you be commending her on how, despite her unhappiness with the whole situation, she’s still supporting and loving Chaz?
Especially in an article where you call out someone else’s use of incorrect pronouns or wording, maybe you could try using the correct ones yourself? I hope this doesn’t come off as too rude, but it jarred pretty badly. Cher seems fairly supportive to me, and while moving to the correct wording shouldn’t take that long, occasional slips happen.
I think you’re being overly critical here. I have a close friend who I’ve known since childhood who is FTM transgender. Having known him for the last 15 years of my life as a girl, it’s been hard work on my part to always get the pronouns right. I’m sure Chaz doesn’t hate on Cher. At least she’s being accepting and understanding, which is a heck of a lot more than you can say for a bunch of parents of transgender/transsexual people!
I don’t think it’s disrespectful at all- look at what tense she was speaking in when she called Chaz “she”- past. She said “she was a lesbian”- that’s right, Chaz was a she when she was a lesbian. Then she stuck with the same pronoun for two sentences more, and then at the end when talking about who Chaz is NOW, she said “He”. I think it must be complicated when talking about the past or the process of going from she to he, but I don’t think Cher’s screwed anything up here. I think it’s just a case of that she thinks of Chaz as her son now, but Chaz WAS her daughter for a long time. I think the only person who should be getting upset about this is Chaz, and if Chaz thinks Cher slipped up, then he can always just call her on it. (It’s not like Cher is officially the spokesperson for all transgendered people just because she has a trans son)
goddam get over the respecting and disrespectful and all that nonesense, please.
She gender reassigned. So, she is a he. See. Two pronouns for the same person.