As I’m sure you remember, a couple of weeks ago Paris Hilton got arrested for cocaine possession.  One might think that since Paris has already been caught with weed twice this summer, this little cocaine bit might just be enough for her to see some jail time, but no worries!  Paris will be free to take care of her bunnies to her heart’s content!

In exchange for a guilty plea, Paris is going to get off with a year of probation, a $2,000 fine, 200 hours of community service, and enrollment in a drug abuse program.  And here’s the last part of the deal:  if Paris gets into anymore trouble while on probation, she gets a year in jail.

Ok, but this is Paris Hilton.  Does anyone really think she can go a full year without getting into trouble?  The girl gets caught with drugs about as often as I get caught watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and crying (which is very often.  Do you guys remember when Angel lost his soul or when Buffy made that great sacrifice for Dawn in the fifth season finale?  So upsetting).  I’m betting it’ll be before winter that Paris smokes some weed in public or gets caught shooting up in a Wendy’s bathroom and then doesn’t go to jail.

Because I adore My Chemical Romance.  Their last album, The Black Parade, came out back in 2006 (and has been touching my soul for the past four years), and after taking a hiatus so that a few of the band members could get married and have babies and do that whole thing, they are back.  They’ve just announced the name of their new album, Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys, set for release on November 22, and released this little teaser.  From the looks of it, it’s going to be another awesome concept album, and I do love me some concept albums.  Color me pumped!

I think when it comes to My Chemical Romance, you either love them or love to make fun of the people who love them.  So this is a little something for everyone.  So you’re welcome.

Nicole Kidman’s latest movie, Rabbit Hole, recently premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival.  If you don’t know about Rabbit Hole, let me give you a little bit of background.  It’s based on a play, and it’s about a woman (played by Nicole) whose son gets hit by a car and dies.  The character in the play, and I assume the movie, is understandably not doing so well in the aftermath of that.  There are scenes that feature the character screaming at her mother about how God is a sadistic prick, arguing with her husband about which one of them is to blame for the death of her son, and a pretty powerful scene where the teenage boy who hit her son visits and she ends up having a total cathartic sobfest.  So yeah, there’s a pretty wide range of emotions, regardless of how close the movie is to the play.  And you know what makes facial expressions of emotion hard?  Botox.

Anyway, here’s an excerpt from an interview with Rabbit Hole director, John Cameron Mitchell:

Not to be mean, gossipy or catty, I swear, but this needs to addressed: Nicole Kidman’s face. As a filmgoer and a Kidman fan, I can’t help but think of how the changing appearance of her face over time affects her characters, her characterizations, and how they’re received. Was that a consideration for you as a director, especially shooting close-ups and attempting to capture expressiveness?
I didn’t really follow the EW timeline of her face. When I met her, that’s who I knew. I sort of remembered some other films. She hasn’t been under the knife. I don’t know anything about Botox, but she certainly wasn’t doing it in our film. In our film, she played the most real person — looking-wise, acting-wise — that she has since… Dogville’s an amazing performance, though I wouldn’t exactly call that quotidian. Sometimes she wears wigs because her hair gets tangly, but we said no — no wigs. It would save us time, and we’d believe this woman more. And those can sometimes add a layer, no matter how good the wig is.

This was as naked as she can be, especially considering how the character is put together. But shooting on the Red [movie camera] with soft lenses — we were worried about a hard video look — was a good match. We didn’t glam her up; she’s a beautiful woman anyway. But for the first time, she feels like she’s her age. She wasn’t afraid of the shots where she just doesn’t look good — weeping, this and that. She went all the way. Hopefully this film will kind of reduce all of that, because when you’re focusing on something like that, it gets in the way. I mean look: Mickey Rourke did way, much more, and there was a big question about Mickey Rourke’s face. So he goes off and does The Wrestler, and now that’s his face. Whatever. That’s much more extreme. He got past that by playing through it. And yeah — it’s kind of an unfortunate moment in his life that made him feel like he had to do that.

But with her, I think it’s higher standards for women; we wouldn’t be asking these questions of guys. Unless it’s Sylvester Stallone. I feel like there should have been more conversation on that face. But you’re right: They bring it on themselves if they’re going to go there.

This isn’t about gossip, either. I’m talking about in a strictly aesthetic sense. It makes a difference.
I know. People would ask me, “How’s her face?” It’s just so weird. That was just an augur of the types of films she had made, which weren’t of great quality. So what you do focus are things like that: “What is she doing?” And that just says something about her choices in the last few years, maybe.

God bless this interviewer.  ”Yeah yeah, directing process and adaptation and whatever, but hey, I have got to ask, what’s up with Nicole Kidman’s face?”  Excellent.  I also love how earnestly the topic is addressed and how delicately the director answers it.  You know what I would really love though?  If some director who’s worked with Nicole Kidman would just let her know that she can’t really show emotion that well anymore.  That would be the best.

And after we all had such high hopes for her.

Yeah, last week Lindsay tested positive for cocaine, and she also failed another drug test for an unspecified substance that was not cocaine.  The failure of a drug test is supposed to mean 30 days of jail, but I guess we’ll see about that.  I mean, she spent only 23 of what was originally 90 days in rehab, so it doesn’t look like anyone is too concerned about strict adherence to sentences in this situation.  It’s also being said that because of these test results, the judge might refuse to let Lindsay leave the state, which would mean no Inferno or Saturday Night Live, but again, we’ll see.

In typical Lindsay fashion, she took to her Twitter to explain the situation:

Regrettably, I did in fact fail my most recent drug test and if I am asked, I am prepared to appear before judge Fox next week as a result.

Substance abuse is a disease, which unfortunately doesn’t go away over night. I am working hard to overcome it and am taking positive steps forward every day. I am testing every single day and doing what I must do to prevent any mishaps in the future.

This was certainly a setback for me but I am taking responsibility for my actions and I’m prepared to face the consequences.

I am so thankful for the support of my fans, loved ones and immediate family, who understand that i am trying hard, but also that I am a work in progress, just as anyone else. I am keeping my faith, and I am hopeful….Thank you all!!!

To be honest, I’m kind of over it.  At this point, I feel like Lindsay is kind of like my cousin who used to be completely awesome and fun and smart and just great until she started doing cocaine, and it was a little iffy for a few years, like there were still the memories of her being her old self and doing great things, but then she went off to snort a line or whatever, and now it’s hard to care anymore because she keeps dropping out of rehab and telling lies and stealing my grandma’s nerve pills.  That’s what Lindsay Lohan is like.

I know addiction is a disease, but if you don’t treat a disease, it’s not really going to get better.

Bleeding heart and cocaine user Paris Hilton recently did a good thing. Kind of. The pet-loving heiress was in a pet store recently when she learned that the cage of bunnies she was looking at were being sold as snake food. Paris decided right then and there that she’d be taking all the rabbits with her.

Paris wrote the following about her new additions on Twitter:

“The bunnies were meant to be feeders. I saw them at the pet store and they told me they were for snake food and I had to save them.

“I rescued 20 of them. They are now happy living in my backyard. They are all so happy, so nice to have changed their fate.”

I love animals too, ParPar, but you can’t stop the circle of life. Snake owners have to feed their snakes too, and unfortunately, snakes eat mice and bunnies. It’s not their fault that their food of choice is naturally adorable.

Also, let’s not forget that Paris is far from the best pet owner. In a way, the bunnies may have been better off being used for their purpose.

It’s been awhile since Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have done press together, but they’re back in the game and just hit up the Ellen show yesterday (the episode aired today.)

Ellen asked the girls about their “secret twin powers” (Ashley says they’re mirror twins, so when one of them is up, the other is down and they need to keep each other checked) before gifting them with oversized purses and sunglasses. The clip above is short, but you get to see the twins interact with Ellen enough that you’ll be convinced that they turned out OK.

But if you’re looking for something negative to harp on, at one point Ellen complimented the twins for staying out of trouble all these years in Hollywood, perhaps forgetting that Mary-Kate entered rehab at the age of 18 for anorexia and a rumored coke problem. And some people think she may have had something to do with the death of Heath Ledger.