What you are looking at is a still from Seal’s new music video, featuring his model wife, Heidi Klum. No, it’s not from a sex tape, but if I told you it was, I’m sure you’d believe me. Heidi and Seal are one of Hollywood’s hottest couples because it’s so obvious that the two of them can’t keep their hands off of each other. Heidi’s been pregnant since she met the dude and there was also that confession she made on Oprah where she said the first thing she noticed about her man was the huge bulge in his Speedo.

So, yeah. Check this out, ya perverts:

Remember just a short year or two ago when the word “conservator” meant absolutely nothing to us? Like, it wasn’t even on the SATs? It’s as if we would have never even known that word existed if it wasn’t for Britney Spears fucking up her life so badly. Now we hear it almost daily. Hi, Lindsay.

I guess in a way, we owe at least a small portion of our knowledge to Hollywood’s trainwreck posse, right?

And according to RadarOnline, Britney’s dad’s babysitting duty isn’t going to be over any time soon:

After meeting separately in closed chambers with both Spears and with her father Jamie – who controls his daughter’s personal and financial matters- Judge Reva Goetz said in open court, “I met with him (Jamie) and her (Britney) spearately. I had a very nice conversation with her. Mr. Ingham (Britney’s attorney) was present.”

In all, Judge Goetz met with Britney for about a half hour; she did not reveal what they discussed.

Judge Goetz then said another hearing on the matter will be held on October 14.

I would have paid some serious money to see what went down in those interviews. Probably twice what I would pay to see her in concert, which is roughly $88.

But I think it’s great that Britney’s dad has pulled through for her like all of this during his daughter’s time of need. Say what you will about the Spears family, but those people care a lot about their kids.

If you’ve ever thought anything along the lines of “You know what would be a good thing?  If Justin Timberlake were to cover several of the most popular hip-hop songs ever,” then you are in luck.  Toss Jimmy Fallon in there, and I think I just made your dreams come true.

While JT was on Jimmy Fallon’s show to promote The Social Network, the boys ended up talking about the Sugarhill Gang, and from there they launched into what I think is one of the most powerful musical performances of the year.  The duo performed snippets of songs like “California Love” by Tupac, “Work It” by Missy Elliot, and Kanye’s “Gold Digger,” before finishing up with “Empire State of Mind.”  And it was just as magical as it sounds.

I think this performance proves two things:  Justin Timberlake needs to do the world a favor and come back to music, and Jimmy Fallon needs to stick solely to music.   Music is the only thing Jimmy Fallon can give to society.  I think it’s because he has to focus too much on technique and timing to consistently break character.

A butterfly shirt. A fucking butterfly shirt. And an ugly one at that. I hate butterflies. I can’t stand when people get butterflies tattooed on their backs, I don’t like butterflies flying at my face, and the idea of cocoons and metamorphosis? Yeah? GROSS.

So little Selena Gomez was photographed checking out the sights in London earlier this week wearing that … unfortunate butterfly shirt with some weird irridescent butterfly scarf and really horrendous earrings. I know she’s a young girl and what not, but come the fuck on. Those damned earrings went out of vogue while I was a freshman in high school, and I graduated back in 2001.

Sorry, girl. You’re still cute as hell and talented to boot, but the look from the waist up? F to the ail.

“My acting teacher and music teachers didn’t really like me and they kind of ignored me. I think that they were threatened by the fact that I had worked before. Maybe it made them feel uncomfortable. I would have loved for them to have taught me but maybe they felt like they couldn’t. They just ignored me and didn’t really pay attention to me. Like, they were stupid … it was pretty silly of them. I’m on a show called Glee right now and I could sing their praises, but unfortunately I don’t have anything to say.”

Um, wow. I guess I was wrong about that whole down-to-earth thing. I’ll admit — I’m wrong sometimes. This was one of them. But Lea? Could we take the Mariah Carey down, like, six notches or so? I mean, you haven’t even been all that popular for a whole minute yet. OK? So let’s try not to break out the award-winning speeches until it’s time, aight girl?

And he’s actually going as far as to file the petition, or so he says, but I’ll believe it when I see it. Michael Lohan, the alleged former drug addict/alcoholic and woman-beater father of Lindsay Lohan has long blown steam about what’s ‘best’ for Lindsay, but he’s never actually put his money where his mouth is. In his defense, Lindsay has always been pretty staunch about avoiding him at all costs, but in a move that’s sure to cause a lot of controversy, Lohan (the male one, that is) has announced that over the next few days he will file paperwork in order to begin a conservatorship over the out-of-control Lindsay. And Michael Sr. isn’t the only concerned family member — Michael Lohan Jr. (who I didn’t even know existed) spoke to People magazine about his thoughts on his older sister:

“People she was surrounded by – enablers, leeches, whatever you’d like to call it – made things very difficult,” he [Michael Lohan Jr.] says. “It’s quite strenuous to right your wrongs when the people around you help justify your actions. Therefore, cloudy judgment made it easy for her to neglect those trying to guide her.”

“People with addictive tendencies do not get better overnight, so that cannot be expected. However, her commitment to her current recovery is a side effect of the realization of her past mishaps.”

“She has made conscious efforts to improve her lifestyle behaviors and to treat this process with great care. In order to continue her healing process, she’s willing to take whatever steps necessary,” Michael adds. “We – her mother, brothers, and sister – have been there for Lindsay every step of the way – despite what trashy news reports – and will continue to give her our support and strength during these arduous times.”

What do you guys think? Will Michael the father actually gain control over his daughter’s fledgling life, or does this have ‘bad idea’ written all over it?