Taylor Momsen must be pissed she wasn’t offered this role.
It was just announced that Maggie Gyllenhaal has been cast in Hysteria, a film set in the Victorian era that focuses on the invention of the vibrator.
Maggie will be playing the daughter of a doctor who invents a new, vibrating cure for hysteria. Yes, that’s totally actually how vibrators were invented. To treat hysteria. Little did they realize, they’d also cure boredom, loneliness and the desire to sleep with people who generally gross you out so you can get some Goddamn play.
That should be good. Hope her brother makes one about the invention of the butt plug next. Did I go to far?
True Blood co-stars Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer tied the knot in Malibu yesterday. The bride wore a simple halterneck gown with Neil Lane jewels, and the groom wore a traditional dark suit. A source spoke to People and gave a generic “I was at their wedding”-type quote, “It was a beautiful evening to get married and the sunset was gorgeous. Anna and Stephen seemed very excited to celebrate their wedding day with their families and close friends.”
Isn’t that just great for them! Maybe their vampire love will inspire Kristen and Rob to do the right thing.
Bad news, tennis fans (and I’m sure that there are dozens of you out there.) Serena Williams has announced that she wont be playing in this year’s US Open due to a continued pain in her right knee. After Wimbledon this year, Serena hurt her knee on a broken glass and the slow healing process has made her unfit to play.
“It is with much frustration and deep sadness that I am having to pull out of the U.S. Open,” the tournament’s three-time champion said in a statement released Friday by her publicist.
The tennis superstar’s withdrawal also means she won’t team with older sister Venus to defend the doubles title they won in at the U.S. Open last year. Venus, who hasn’t competed on tour since Wimbledon because of a bothersome left knee, is expected to play singles at the tournament, which kicks off Aug. 30 in Flushing Meadows, N.Y.
Wow. Well, I’m sure that news is devastating to someone who cares.
What I’ve pulled from this is that Serena Williams is in a weakened state and so she probably doesn’t have it in her to tackle and kill me. She’s huge, you know? I’m afraid of her.
“You know what was amazing to me? Finally not having a frickin’ cop outfit. I’m so tired of these butchy polyester outfits. It seems every time I do something I’m wearing some government outfit – it’s so annoying. With the exception of Fast And The Furious, I’m always in uniform. I’m always like, ‘Can I just get rid of this butch outfit and be hot for once?’”
- Michelle Rodriguez to Movie Hole on finally playing a more feminine part in Machete.
It was announced earlier this week that my wish came true and Danielle Staub has been fired from Real Housewives of New Jersey. The former convict immediately made claims that she was going to be given a spin-off by Bravo, and if not that, she’d at least be appearing on the Real Housewives of New York City. No such luck, Danielle. No such luck.
Bravo is so fed up with dealing with Danielle that they want nothing to do with her. Especially after Real Housewives of New York City cast members said they would be leaving the show if she were to make an appearance.
Additionally, Danielle’s ex-husband has finally decided to step in and do something about the fact that his daughters are living with a crazy person. He decided to attempt to gain custody after discovering that no work permits have been filed for his daughter Jillian’s participation on the show. Breaking child labor laws? Not good.
All of this news is sad. The woman messed up her life and the lives of her children in order to participate in this show and in the long run, none of it will have been worth it. The good news (for us folks at home anyway)? Apparently Bravo gave her the heave-ho right before the reunion taping, so you know that that’s going to be two hours of completely buckwild television.
Roseanne Bar set up shop in our nation’s capital yesterday to announce that she’s running for President of the United States and Prime Minister of Isreal. Before you shut her down, watch these videos. I gotta say, she makes some good points:
“…I will outlaw bullshit. After the passage of this law, the Patriarchy will inevitably start to crumble, as will the concept of war itself, which is largely a large load of bullshit.”
“The people must have justice, and so I want to reinstate and enshrine the blessed and holy guillotine – a fast and painless execution of justice, and of execution. There’s simply no kinder way of death than a swift and painless death.”
“All prime ministers, queens, and presidents will be required to fight in the very first infantry wave of any war they authorize. Trust me, this will make for some productive peace talks, people.”
I don’t think Roseanne expects her campaign to get very far, but she’s always spoke her mind and her thoughts are totally valid. Hopefully those who actually have a chance of getting elected are listening!
If you had to elect an actor for president, who do you think would do the best job?
I would like to tell you that the term “retard” is very offensive to me. I am not offended because I ASSUME it would offend someone who has mental retardation. I am offened on how the word came to...
I am not offended that Rosie has a fear or anxiety of LP. I feel that when someone knows very little about things and or people they tend to be anxious. Think about it if you had never been around someone...
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