Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Do You Want to Be Jennifer Lopez’s Personal Assistant?

Here’s a hint:  the correct answer is “fuck no.”  If you have any doubts about that, check out the job requirements listed in September’s issue of Life and Style:

“The person has to be graceful under pressure, have a thick skin, and be resourceful in foreign countries, among others things,” an insider tells the Scene Queens. “You’ll be expected to travel at a moment’s notice and must know how to adjust in each city.”

As expected, working for a celebrity like J. Lo isn’t a 9-5 job. “You can’t have a personal life — no baggage, significant others or pets allowed. The job is 6 days a week, at least 12 hour days with one day off, but you may not get off for weeks,” says the insider. “You’ll be on call 24/7 and you’ve got to be organized and always on point.”

And while hanging out with A-Listers may be glamorous – the insider notes the candidate must be comfortable around “very high profile people” – there are more mundane duties as well.

“You have to change diapers, work on little sleep and cook if the butler is away,” the insider continues. And: “You have to know when J. Lo has her snack time. She won’t say she’s hungry, you’re just expected to have food waiting.” But don’t worry, there will be some glamorous moments too; our source says qualified candidates get to help J. Lo dress for red carpet events and photo shoots.

The salary for this gig? $55,000 to $65,000. Tickets to the Oscars may or may not be included!

Yeah, there’s a specification that you can’t have a personal life, and yes, you have to be telepathically in tune with Jennifer Lopez at all times, but OMG, you might get to go to the Oscars!

But really, the only way I would ever sign up for this job with those demands is if I knew that Jennifer would recount behind-the-scene stories of Anaconda at least once a week.  I would gladly give up my personal life and my freedom to hear J. Lo talk about wrestling a snake with Ice Cube or getting creeped on by Jon Voight.  Gladly.

14 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Give up my personal life for $55,000-$65,000 a year? Hell no! I’d need a salary greater than that to dote on someone hand and foot. Sure you get to go to the Oscars possibly, but a life without friends would be lonely and unrewarding even with the oscars.

  • LMFAO! This is the funniest crap ever!! Who cares about the flippiin Oscars??!?! She is on the F-list as far as I am concerned… the FUCK OFF list.

  • You know, it’s kind of like the Chelsea’s wedding thing, where she spent more money than Princess Diana on her wedding.. You would expect a Princess to have a 5 Million dollar wedding but not Chelsea fucking Hilton.
    In this case i would expect President Obama to ask for such things, but this fucking idiot? And for 55k a year? How ridiculous is that?

    @Sara i completely agree with you.

  • 12 hour days 6 days a week is 72 hours.
    72 hours a week is 3,744 hours a year.
    $65,000 for 3,744 hours is $17.36 an hour.

    To summarize: you are expected to not have a life, travel at a moment’s notice, be on call always, be a nanny, be a cook and posses telepathic abilities…for $17 an hour. I think it might be difficult to fill this post, even in this economy.

  • I loves me some JLO but omfg!!! What on earth is wrong with this whole thing!! Shame on you Jennifer you came from poverty and you gonna act like now you can treat b\people like shit!!! SHAME ON YOU HEFA!!!

  • i be happies 2 work for J-Lo i don,t care about the money$ im very obdient & a hard worker i be happies 2 do her errands/chores bidding 2

  • To whom it may concern, if you are still looking for a nanny please give me a call.I have raise 3 children of my own and love children.

  • Yes I love Jennifer Lopez, I love her singing and dance great look. I also want to be her Personal Assistant. I am good with Kids and like kids very much. Jennifer, if you arestill loking for a Personal Assistant, please email me (globaltalent@verizon.net)Linda Fulcher.

  • Hi Jennifer, I’m in need of a Job, for a Personal Assistant or Nanny, if you are in need of this service, please contact me on my website;, ladydivamonroe.com aka Linda Fulcher. I’m big fan have watched you on many association, love you.
    If you don’t need my service, please pass this information on to someone who need it. I’m in Los Angeles . I’m a mother of 3 they are all grown now, just me and my husband, getting bored and need something to do. Love children, my husband and I are Foster parents as well. So Jennifer please this information if you don’t need my service. I have never been in jail, I’m bonded, love the Lord , Thank you Be Blessed.