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Goddamn, this kid is backwards. If he wanted to run for mayor, he should have listened quietly, observed mercilessly, and remained in the designer-paid-for-by-contributions back pocket of Sarah Palin’s outdated Calvin Klein jeans. (Sarah’s never heard of 7 For All Mankind or Diesel donchaknow.)
But alas, Johnston allows the Palin family to alienate him alienates himself, and now expects a valid run for Wasilla, Alaska, mayor. Just great.
And it gets worse: sources close to Johnston state that he’s currently pitching a reality show for TLC to document his journey to winning the title of Wasilla mayor called Loving Levi: The Road to the Mayor’s Office. [Dies. Just ... dies.]
Oh, wait. This is a Sarah Palin breed we’re talking about, and it’s apparent one can wear many hats — beauty queen, governor, vice-presidential nominee, president? OK. I get it, then. Playgirl playmate, reality star (?), music video inspiration …
Got it. It’s all falling into place for me now.
Oh, and the chicks in the photo? Are all like, “Squee!! We have a photo with that dreamy dreamboat Levi Johnston! You know, the baby daddy of the teenaged mom? Isn’t it just everyone’s dream to get knocked up by a stodgy, famewhoring, tool before they graduate high school? Oh, let him be mine, let it be me!”
Or maybe they’re just laughing at him. That’s what I’m really hoping it is. Squee.
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7 Responses to “Hide Your Moose: Levi Johnston Wants to Run For Wasilla Mayor”
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Oh Sarah…You always know how to make me laugh <3 You should write more often….
and to remain on topic: did I just spot manboobs on Levi? ewwww
Yeah, it looks like one of them’s boring a hole into the girl-on-his-left’s shoulder (or, uh, right, if you’re Levi). Manboobs!
That is not flattering at all. Ewww! Hahaha. I’m really looking forward to more Levi stories. He seems like such a douche! I have to laugh everytime I read something about him. Such a sad little human.
That’s the sound of Levi Johnson’s 15 minutes of fame beginning to expire. You described him as “stodgy.” I didn’t know you were clairvoyant. You read my thoughts exactly.
dude seriosly this guy doesnt clasify as famous at all so stop talking about him he’s a nobody
TLC? yeeahh, more like VH1.
wow I realistically like your current webpage continue with keep method active in the facts I definitely should pop in many another period to read with some practice greater deserve.