Normally it’s just not right to make fun of people when they’re trying to be charitable, but these photos that Justin Gaston took with his If I Can Dream co-stars are pretty freakin’ funny. Even if you leave out the fact that this naked man who’s grabbing boobies and straddling a lady who’s taking it from both sides is a total hardcore Christian. In fact, Justin’s known for being so Christian that it was rumored he was living with the Cyrus family when he was dating 16 year old Miley. Because, ya know, the Cyrus’ were so sure nothing funny was going on between the two of them. Ugh. Those type of Christians are my favorite.

[photos via JustJared]

I don’t know why this disturbs me as much as it does, but whenever I see Dakota Fanning in a TV interview, I’m like, “What. The. Fuck?” Check out her in Kimmel last night talking about taking the ACTs and learning to drive. It’s like, “Yo, weren’t you still a fetus last year?”

I’m sure it’s just because I grew up watching her grow up and because she’s nearly a decade younger than me that I can’t get over it. That being said, I’m sure I’m not the only one. In many ways, the Twilight series were the perfect movies for Dakota to make her transformation from teen-to-woman during. She’s able to keep her life-long fans engaged while not doing something that will completely shock them or turn them off. What I’m wondering is this: What’s the next move for this chick?

I’m thinking her playing a romcom ingenue might be a bit much, but taking a break to concentrate on college doesn’t really seem like D.F.’s style either.

Do you also think it’s kinda bizarre to watch this young girl grow up in front of our eyes, or do I just need to come to terms with the concept of time?

Look, I love this whacked out bitch. I really do. I am such a fan of her music and I even love a lot of things about her public persona, but she’s always doing things that kind of break my heart. Amy has so many bad ass qualities, but on the other side of that, she also has pushover tendencies that you normally only see in the massively insecure. Drug addition aside, this is a common theme with her.

I’m saying this after finding out that Amy’s finally getting the tattoo she once got for her ex-husband Blake removed… because her new boyfriend wants her to.

From DigitalSpy:

Amy Winehouse has started making plans to remove a tattoo dedicated to ex-husband Blake Fielder-Civil, according to a report.

The singer currently has Blake’s name inked on her right breast but has been using the internet to research laser removal clinics, the Daily Star claims.

It is thought that the 26-year-old was spurred into action after new lover Reg Traviss told her that he was unhappy about the marking.

Sources close to Winehouse have revealed that she is feeling nervous about the pain she might suffer due to the removal procedure. One insider said: “It could take about 15 laser treatments to remove. It could even leave scars or melt her boob implant.”

Ugh! Girl! For real!? I’m thinking that if Amy got the tattoo in the first place, she likely did it because she was deeply in love or deeply influenced by her man at the time. I’m thinking that either way she should have to keep the tat as a reminder not the be that lovesick or that stupid again. And if she were to remove it, I would hope that she’d be smart enough not to do it for the same reason she had it put on there in the first place: to appease some dude who will probably be meaningless in a short amount of time.

Oh, Amy. I’m so tired of you breaking my heart.

Today is Lindsay Lohan’s 24th birthday and in the wee hours of the morning, she Tweeted about the first present she received: A fist in her face. According to Lindsay’s Tweet above, some waitress took it upon herself to do what we all have been dying to do for years: Attempt to knock some sense in to the bitch. Or, you know, the waitress is just as unbalanced as her victim. I can’t be sure. But either way, I’m glad that Lindsay’s spending the first day of her 24th year doing what she does best. You know, creating mad drama?

OK, TRUE.

I don’t know if I believe any words that Will.I.Am says, but his latest ramblings are kind of interesting, so I’m just going to play along.

According to him, James Cameron is going to take a break from making some of the most successful films in the history of films to make a 3-D movie about the Black Eyed Peas.  While speaking about this, Will of course used his characteristic humility and eloquence:

“We have the biggest director because we are the biggest group on the planet. The Peas are filming it in South America. People will be able to see us in the theater with the 3D glasses and everything…There will be a storyline that [Cameron] came up with, which will be dope. It’s a full-length film and it’s based around our tour activities. We’ve toured from America and Europe, to the Middle East, South America, Asia and Africa.”

My personal response to this is something along the lines of “Oh God, no, please please no.”  What about you?

Well, okay.

We’re not really going to have a newsletter.

We are going to have a mailing list for a newsletter that I will probably never send to anyone because, like, if you want to know what’s going on at this site, you could do something like follow us on Twitter or lick us on Facebook or, ya know, read the fucking site like a normal human being.

But certain people who shan’t be named believe we should have a mailing list. Here are the things for which I will use this mailing list, in order of likelihood:

1) To distribute the name, phone number and naked photo of some dude who I just found out is cheating on me even though we never explicitly said we were exclusive but he should have known because in my mind it was clear.

2) To distribute the name, phone number and fake naked photo (I will do it myself in Photoshop) of the chick he’s cheating on me with, even though she’s probably a perfectly nice girl and we’d get along fine under any other circumstance.

3) To keep you guys up-to-date on the whereabouts and romantic goings-on of my little sister, who historically delights in having her private life made public, especially by me.

4) To be all like “OMG DID YOU GUYS SEE LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE OF HOUSE???? We don’t have a piece up about it or anything, but, like, HOLY SHIT, right???? Did that really happen????”

5) To say something related to celebrity gossip.

Also, the subscribe form is pretty funny (I made it that way) and the only thing you need to fill in is your email address. All the other fields can be blank. But I think you’ll want to answer them.

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