That, and they’re all on “strike,” now.

MTV had given the show’s cast ’til last Friday to bring figures to the table for contract negotiation, and all but Snooki and The Situation have failed to talk — but that’s only because Snooki and The Sitch have today as their deadline. Since no one discussed their contracts, MTV felt that their original deal of $10k an episode would stick.

The cast got pissed and whatever, and now they’re supposedly on strike. MTV ordered Snooki and the rest back to work for today, otherwise there’d be legal repercussions.

Why is this happening? Simply because these assholes can’t do simple math or fathom basic logic. MTV explicity told the reality TV “stars” that Season 2 (which they are currently filming) would be broken into two segments: Cycle 2A, and Cycle 2B. Two parts make up a whole, guys, just keep that in mind for this next part, OK? Ready? Great, here goes.

The cast, however, forgot about that whole Cycle 2B thing now that they’ve finished filming Cycle 2A, and claim that Cycle 2B is actually Season 3, and therefore they don’t feel contractually “obligated” to continue at their current rate, or continue filming, when they feel that two months’ worth of appearances is more than sufficient to keep them stocked on Red Bull, cocaine, cheap self-tanner and World Gym memberships. Scary shit, guys. You do realize that this is the show that gave you fame, and if you don’t stick with it at least for another year or two, everyone’s going to forget who you are (if they, uh, haven’t already) and there’ll be no paid appearances?

[Cue the ambient sounds of rather confused crickets.]

Oh, all that and Angelina’s been dumped from the show. Again.

Bunch of tools.

“I want every kind of press,” he says. “She [Heidi] believes in bad press. There’s no way my love for fame and her love for puppies will ever work out successfully. She just wants to hike and hang out and be calmer.”

Spencer Pratt, way more psycho and ego-centric than anyone ever guessed, on the topic of his and Heidi’s impending divorce. You picked a winner, Heidi. Next time, play it safe and stick to your nose.

Well, Celebrity Rehab was nearly canceled, brought back to life, canceled again and now that shit is LEGIT resurrected. Not only have they managed to put together a list of celebs that I’m dying to watch get rehabbed, but I have a pretty good feeling that they’ll all be able to bring the drama.

Joining the cast is Jason Wahler from Laguna Beach and The Hills, Janice Dickinson, Jeremy London (OMFG, SO GOOD), Rachel Uchitel (one of Tiger’s hos), Leif Garrett, and singer Keisha Cole’s mother (that’s a stretch of the word “celebrity” if I’ve ever heard one, but I’ll take it!)

What do I anticipate? I see Rachel screwing everyone on the cast, Jason getting into a physical altercation with either Leif or Jeremy, Jeremy acting like a complete weirdo the whole time, and Janice and Keisha Cole’s mom? Oh, those two are going to be BFF. I’m calling it now.

Thank God for people who never give up! To think that we almost missed out on all this goodness.

We knew it was only a matter of time until we saw some sort of creative effort from the daughter of Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain. Frances, under the name “Fiddle Tim” recently held an exhibition of her sketches called “Scumfuck”.

While I personally don’t find the above drawing to be much more than an advanced notebook doodle, Frances’ work is being praised by critics and family members alike. Her mother said on Twitter, “I adore my daughter and miss her. But that scumfuck stuff is cool.” Well, alright.

What do you think of Frances’ art? Do you think it shows potential or are you also wondering when we’ll be allowed to stop pretending like we care?

Mischa Barton’s new campaign for Phillip Plein seems more like an advertisement for the ego-saving computer program, Photoshop. Sure, sure. You’d have to search far and wide for an original image of this nature, but when retouching is taken to this level, it begs the question, “Do you think we’re all a bunch of fucking idiots?”

Between the waist, the legs and the flawless face, I know that that ain’t no Mischa Barton I’m looking at. That’s a cartoon. In a world where no one’s unaware of photo retouching, I’m not sure why it is that the people who edit these things take them to such extremes. If I were the kind of person to buy something because a celebrity I liked used the product, then I’d want to make sure that someone who actually looks like the celebrity I like was selling it, not a plastic doll-looking version of them.

So I am one of the only people on the planet who hasn’t seen Inception yet, but I know something from leaving my house in the past 24 hours and that’s that this movie is all anybody wants to talk about.

Considering the film took in over $60 million its first weekend, I know that means some of you have seen it and probably want to talk about it, so I’m making a safe space for you here in the comments.

Feel free to discuss theories, thoughts, opinions and ask people what happened during those five minutes when you had to get up to pee. Just one thing: No complaining about spoilers, stupid. I’m not even touching these comments until I’ve gotten my butt to the theater.

Now have fun with that…