Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Lindsay Lohan Goes to Jail? LIVEBLOGGING THIS BITCH!

So, Lindsay’s official surrender time is 11:30 AM ET (or 8:30 AM PST, if you’re on the West Coast in the US), and everyone’s wondering if she’s going to show.

I’ve been watching the TMZ live feed since it began about a half hour ago, and it never ceases to amaze me that there are some pretty vultured-out people out there in the world. I mean, I’m pretty voyeuristic when it comes to this kind of stuff (most people are, whether they want to believe it or not), but the guys and girls lined up outside of the courthouse are all like, “Dude! There’s an open spot here, come stand next to me!”, acting like it’s Christmas or a huge line to get tickets to their favorite show or whatever. I’m sitting here, with bated breath, rapt attention, and hoping sincerely that I don’t have to pee for the next twenty minutes or so. PS, TMZ: E! Online’s video stream is way better.

But whatever. Twenty-two minutes to go ’til Lindsay’s deadline arrives. Will she make it, or will we start receive breaking reports that she’s been hospitalized or something?

Stay tuned …

[Update 11:10 AM ET: Security guards are telling everyone to back up “about a foot.” Looks like she might be on her way soon. They always know stuff we don’t.]

[Update 11:15 AM ET: I just overheard someone saying that she’s left “the house.” Let’s hope she’s not late.]

[Update 11:17 AM ET: Fucking Michael Lohan arrives!!!]

[Update 11:19 AM ET: Lots of trashy-looking people arriving for other court-related infractions, basking in the fact that they’re on camera. You can hear Michael in the background saying, “Just leave my daughter alone.”]

[Update 11:22 AM ET: Still no Lindsay. Dude, move your hairy elbow. I just knew I’d have to go to the bathroom before this was all over. Sheriffs still telling people to back up.]

[Update 11:26 AM ET: Four minutes ’til deadline. Wouldn’t you just die if she didn’t show up? I don’t know how much longer I can hold it!]

[Update 11:31 AM ET: OK. The time has come … and gone. Still no Lindsay. Leave it to the Beav to be fashionably late. People are still being all festive and jovial-like.]

[Update 11:37 AM ET: SHE ARRIVES! Pandemonium ensues, insanity everywhere! People yelling, “DON’T FUCKING PUSH ME!”, fights breaking out, Lindsay’s practically RUNNING. Oh, and my internet crashed.]

[Update 11:43 AM ET: Lindsay looks like she’s having an anxiety attack in the courtroom. Lawyer’s trying to pull out stops on “completing programs,” hoping that it’ll sway the Judge. Heh. As if. … Cameras are off, but audio’s still running. Dammit.]

[Update 11:47 AM ET: I hear handcuffs!! She’s been remanded to serve her sentence NOW, and off she goes!]

[Update 11:50 AM ET: People outside holding signs saying, “Free Lindsay!” and screaming, “Let Lindsay go!” Jeez.]

[Update 12:31 PM ET:  Lindsay’s caravan is still on its way to the jail, where tons of people are awaiting her arrival.  Can’t imagine what she’s feeling, sitting inside that official silver car.]

[Update 12:47 PM ET: Lindsay’s caravan has arrived (two cars) and has pulled into a tarp-covered bay at the correctional facility. As of this time, Lindsay’s literally in jail.

3 CommentsLeave a comment

  • E!’s live feed is full of the most delusional people I’ve ever seen in my life. Michael Lohan’s ‘statement’, the weirdos screaming ‘father of the year! we love you michael! you look great!’, and the ‘save lindsay’ signs occuring all within about a minute were all i could take. Ugh.

  • I never really thought you were that much of a bitch. I guess when its your probelm you seek all the compassion you can get.