You know who I forget exists all the time? Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony’s twins, Emme and Max. That’s why I’m posting these photos. I think this might be the first time I’ve seen either of these kids’ photo since they were infants. They’re no Suri Cruise, you know? If I haven’t come across photos of them in at least a year, that means they’re probably living a somewhat normal life. Sure, they probably have pet tigers at home and don’t know the word “no”, but at least they’ve been shielded from the cameras, for the most part. Body guards aside, these kids look really typical.

Sunday afternoon my friend Deanna Brooks invited me to hang out with her at the Playboy Mansion. Deanna was a Miss May 1998, and after being around the Mansion for over a decade (yes, a decade. She looks 22 still. It’s ridiculous), she knows a ton about the property’s history. The video above is essentially a six minute tour around the house that I get slightly drunk during. I mean, it ends with me jumping off the top of the grotto into the pool, so you know I wasn’t totally sober. It’s also maybe NSFW because there is one butt and one pair of boobs in it, but only for a second. Also, it’s the Playboy Mansion, so I guess just use your head before you click the video. I don’t know where you work.

The highlights of the Mansion was definitely the zoo (did you know the Mansion is licensed as a zoo!?) They have like, fifty monkeys! And both human and non-human bunnies are running loose on the property at all times! Bananas! And there’s a full bar! And everyone’s so nice.

So, if this interests you, I hope you enjoy it. Follow Deanna on Twitter. And me too, if you want.

Yo, so we can just call Shannon Price mentally retarded now, right? It’s not wrong? It’s a factual statement? No? OK, well, then whatever.

Gary Coleman’s ex-wife who probably is responsible for his death is still doing interviews. This time she sat down with RadarOnline to clear up the rumors that she’s a gold digger and of course, being somewhat slow, Shannon failed to convincingly clear her name.

“I’m not a gold digger. I never took advantage of Gary’s money. I had that much respect for him because I knew the extent of how many people took advantage of him.”

“When I met Gary, I never knew who he was, never even knew his name. I kept calling him ‘Shorty’ for awhile because I forgot.”

“Everyone says I’m not emotional, but I am, I have a different way of feeling and grieving than other people and I just don’t like to do it in front of people. But I do grieve in my own way.”

“Gary and I didn’t think clearly with some of the decisions we had made and we did let our emotions get the best of us sometimes. But our love for each other kept us going no matter what. We were always still by each other’s side at the end of the day.”

“I just want the world to know that I will never be able to find anyone like Gary. He really was my life, he’s what made me tick, he’s what made my heart beat, he’s what made my world go round. And I’ll never forget that.”

Shannon was prompted to make these statements after accusations that she was using her ex-husband’s death to cash in on interviews and photo ops, but I’m not sure if doing yet another paid interview is the best way to get everyone to believe her.

Madonna’s 13 -ear old daughter Lola Leon has apparently started a fashion blog and you guys, she’s so cool.

Here’s her first post:

Helluuur thurrrr, I’m Lola and this is my first blog entry so it’s kind of like ummmm….I’m just going to use this blog entry to tell y’all a little bit about myself. I’m 13 and I’ll be 14 in October, so I can’t wait for that because I am FINALLY allowed to dye my hair… THANK YOU MOTHER!! My favvvv color is black (just because it goes with everything) and my least favorite color is brown (because it resembles the color of something QUITE gross).

I am totally obsessivo about 80’s shorts… You know the kind that makes your butt look kinda big, with a grunge-looking shirt tucked in. It’s kinda nerdy but I love it. And the 80’s are another huge obsession of mine, which is totally amazingly awesome because Material Girl…HELLO! It’s like 80’s themed, which pretty much rocks, so yeah. I’m still in love with brogues or as some people call them “oxford shoes”. I haven’t found a good sandal so I’m on like a search right now.

I’m in London right now and the best stores ever here,I love the vintage stores down in Whitechapel, also a lot of hot guys hang there just in case y’all care. Music wise My Chemical Romance is THE BEST BAND EVER for realzzzz. They are so awesome it hurts. If you don’t know who they are just… go away OR download their songs.

So, as you may know, Material Girl is coming out soon… HOLLA HOLLA! Ok and this is pretty awesome I will send a FREE t-shirt  to the first person who can  tell me in which big store the opening of Material Girl is….how cool rigghhhhhht???Annnnnnd I am 4 realz excited for the opening which I will give you the exact dates for in my next blog entry, so stay tuned for more.

So I want to know what you guys think about rompers… is that like a hit or miss, ‘cause I’m not sure. If you comment, be sure to tell me what you think.

OK but no joke gladiator sandals are OUT. They came out in summer 2008 and I was like, ok those are really cute. Then 2009 comes around and people are still wearing them so I’m like, ok whatever it’s just a phase. BUT NOOOOO. Because good old 2010 is now coming along and people are STILL wearing them, and then I was just like OK NO! It’s been three years people COME ON!!!!!!!!! I’m just like what????

Ok so I think that is sufficient for my first blog entry and what do you know, it wasn’t all like “ummmmm”. I look forward to writing my second one. Stay tuned if you don’t already think I’m annoying.

XO Lola

Damn. I was in like, 4th grade when Madonna gave birth to this little chicken. At time time everyone was scared that Madonna would raise some batchild or something, but it looks like she bred the perfect little teenaged hipster. HOLLA HOLLA!

And, no, I’m not talking about what down-home Lady Spears uses to hang dry her just-washed underoos so they flap in the breeze and get that outdoor deep fryer smell, either.

Britney just wrapped up the process of designing her own clothing line — marketed through Candie’s — which will be sold at Kohl’s stores nationwide starting July 1st, and she claims that all of the pieces for her line have been hand-selected and designed by the very own Brit herself:

“I wanted to design clothes that I would wear and my fans would wear. That was the most important thing to me. I wanted to make both daytime casual looks and fun dresses to go out in at night. I met with the design team for Candie’s and Kohl’s, and we started making sketches and designed a line. I got to approve every single piece in the line. It was really a lot of fun … This collection really represents my personal style. I took pieces from my ‘Circus’ tour and pieces that I wear every day. I love denim, so I made sure to include a lot of jeans. I can’t wait for it to come out.”

So yeah. Prepare for a lot of stained, tiered skirts, awkward looking turtlenecks and “jeans that are very, very cool because they’re faded.” And bras? Fuck no. We don’t need no stinking bras.

Watch the cheesetastic video below of an exclusive sneak preview of Britney’s clothing line unveiling.

I’m not sure what’s more shocking: that Jennifer Capriati’s latest ex-boyfriend is a porn star, or that there’s actually a male porn star floating around out there by the name of “Dale DaBone.” Oh, yeah, or that a tennis superstar actually considered dating a person with the last name of “DaBone.” Or the first name of “Dale.” Appalled all over the place.

Anyway, DaBone (oh, Christ) spoke to TMZ, stating that he had ideas as to why Capriati overdosed and ended up in the hospital. DaBone claims that televised tennis matches (i.e., Wimbledon) always depress the former tennis phenom, and that the latest hum surrounding the matches could have pushed her over the edge. DaBone also claims that he’d recently spoken to her about the fact that he’d be making another porno, and claimed that the news sent her into hysterics. So that might have set her off, too.

However, DaBone completely negates his statements by saying that he doesn’t believe Capriati would intentionally take her own life, anyway. So. I guess that’s that.

If I were Capriati, I’d be completely mortified that the public knows I dated a douche by the name of Dale DaBone, because come on. DaBone? Like, you know, debone? It makes me think of a floppy-assed piece of chicken and man, when you’re in the porn industry, the last thing you want people associating with your name — or wee willy whippersnapper — is the word “floppy.”

Crawl back into your some hole, Dale.