You know, I haven’t eaten yet this morning. And while I was scouring the internet for stuff to talk to you guys about, I came across this photo of Tom Brady in attendance at a Celtics-Lakers game earlier in the week. Though I haven’t put a thing in my mouth just yet, I threw up a little bit. In my mouth. I was going to make coffee; I just hadn’t yet. And I’m thankful. Because there’s nothing quite as bad as spitting up coffee-tinged bile on an empty stomach.
Bieber Brady and his ridick hair. Please, please don’t tell me that there’s actually anyone out there who digs it. Really. Unless you’re under the age of thirteen, you have positively no excuse to fawn all over Tom’s abomination of a hairstyle.
OK. Now that the storm has passed, I’m going to go and make some coffee. I think it’s safe, and the time is right.
He looks like some kind of low-brow serial killer, especially in the gallery photos. I had, like, the biggest “celebrity crush” on Tom a few years back, but now? Goddamn.