Shanna Moakler is funny. This weekend her arch nemesis, anti-gay marriage advocate and former Miss USA contestant, Carrie Prejean got married. Not wanting to stiff Carrie on her big day, Shanna ordered her a Waterford Crystal picture frame that she’d registered for… and put one of her “No on H8″ campaign photos in it. I can only imagine Carrie’s face when she opened the expensive but totally backhanded gift from her frenemy.

I think this is kind of the perfect prank. Plenty mean, but at the end of the day, both Carrie and Shanna know that photo won’t last more than a second in that expensive frame. It’s certainly a step up from pushing people down flights of stairs.

A new Batman movie is in the works, and Robin Williams feels he’s owed a part in it. Yo’kay, Robin Williams.

Supposedly Robin was up for the role of both The Joker and The Riddler, and those roles went to Jack Nicholson and Jim Carrey. With The Riddler reappearing in the new movie, Robin thinks that this is his time to shine. The actor spoke to Empire Magazine and said, “I would do Batman in a second. I’d play The Riddler in the next one, although it would be hard to top Heath Ledger as the villain and I’m a little hairy for tights. The Batman films have screwed me twice before: years ago they offered me The Joker and then gave it to Jack Nicholson, then they offered me The Riddler and gave it to Jim Carrey. I’d be like, ‘Ok, is this a real offer? If it is, then the answer’s yes. Don’t pump me again motherf**kers’.”

If Robin does wind up being cast, I don’t think it would be a terrible choice. Probably not the best pick (What was the last good movie he was in? I mean, forrrreal), but definitely not the worst. But still, the begging/entitlement? It’s not a good look.

Jill Zarin, despite her absolutely heinous behavior on season 3 of Real Housewives of New York City, is in many ways the backbone of the show. Today after hearing that Jill may not participate in season 4 and instead go on a spiritual journey, I have to wonder if there’s even a point in the show continuing.

Let’s face it: After fame sets in, the women on these show completely change. Most of the season 3 drama was driven by Tweets, press and scandal, three things that most normal housewives don’t really have to worry about. The illusion of these women living fabulous but ordinary lives has been completely swept away, and all us folks watching at home have to cling to is how much we care for the characters. With Bethenny and Jill both talking about leaving the show, what would be left? Ramona, LuAnn, Sonja and Alex running after the remaining table scraps. Gross.

With Beverly Hills and D.C. versions of the show being filmed now, I think it’s time for the New York City cast to be put to bed. These shows just go stale after a few seasons.

So these photos from Vogue Home Japan are being passed around and everyone who looks at them for more than a split second has had the same question: Is that Lady Gaga? The profile, the eyes and the super skinny bod are all there, but why would Gaga do something like this after fighting rumors that she has a dick for so long? Oh wait. Because that’s exactly what she would do. I’m thinking this is her. What about you?

So Bret Michaels did an interview with Parade, and I feel weird about it because I don’t understand how I teared up at a Bret Michaels interview.  I guess my idea of Bret Michaels is forever tied to the Poison posters my sister used to have in her room, but he’s gone and turned into an eloquent, inspirational musician.  Well, there was “Something to Believe In,” but let’s just focus on the here and now.

On his health and how it’s affected him:

“I’m feeling pretty good. Each day I feel a little bit better. As the chemical meningitis from the bleed starts to dissipate, it gets a little bit better. The bottom line is, I got really sick and it all had a domino effect for me, from the appendicitis to the brain hemorrhage. And then I had a warning stroke, and now they found out I got a hole in my heart, which I’m going to go get an operation for that in the late fall, early winter. But I just said to myself, you know what? Whatever it is, I live my life passionately. And music is a powerful healer for me. I’ve learned a lot of it is mind over matter. Once I knew that I had a chance to survive the brain hemorrhage, I was taking life and grabbing it for everything I could.”

On the importance of balancing his family and his career:

“I absolutely love my family. I’m a very hands-on father. I’m close with my kids and we have fun together. Kristi and I love and respect each other. But in the same sentence, I also love what I do. I love being on the road and I’m passionate and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. The trouble is finding the balance of making both work.”

And then there was the closing quote of the article that sealed the tears:

“I hope that my legacy is this: I’m a fighter, a survivor and I rocked the world. That would be it.”

Bret’s solo album comes out July 6th, so I guess I’ll just go ahead and pencil in “music-listening and uncontrollable weeping” on that day. And I’m ok with that.

Hey, remember that one time that Lindsay Lohan got a DUI and she also had cocaine on her?  Then remember when she was in court for that and she ended up in jail for about five minutes?  Yeah, that wasn’t so much because of Mean Girls or whatever but more because the cops on the case were not exactly the highest apples in the tree, if you know what I mean.

TMZ obtained the police report for the incident, and it tells the tale of a very confused man who

“discovered a folded Clinique sun care card with an unknown substance caked on to the surface of the card in Lohan’s right rear pocket. Some of the white substance fell to the floor.  I used my foot to see what had fell but thought nothing of it.  I did not recognize the substance attached to the card and initially thought the substance was a wet crushed breath mint. I put the card into the jail trash can next to the booking windows.  I was looking at the floor and began to recognize the substance as resembling powder cocaine.   I then recovered the card from the trash.”

I don’t know the circumstances surrounding this man’s life and his choices, but it seems to me that if you find a card caked in a “white substance” in the pocket of someone you just arrested, it might be a safe bet to to go ahead and hold on to that.  But he didn’t:  he contaminated that evidence, Lindsay got out of real jail time, and just look at her now.